A Day In The Life Of An Ordinary Ex-Teenager

Aargh!

2009-03-02T01:48:00.000+05:30

I am angry and upset and confused and indignant. I'm dazed and sad and bewildered and hurt.

Maybe i overreact. Maybe i expect too much. Maybe i'm too idealistic. I don't know.

I want to run away and stay next to a beach and read Wodehouse and listen to the Beatles and drink vodka with pepsi. I want to make new friends and do new things and learn how to play the guitar properly and open a restaurant for a living.

P.S. - I hate pretentious people and people who don't vote. Yes i am opinionated. So what?

Trivial Trivia

2009-02-19T01:58:00.001+05:30

Is it just me or does everyone have a masochistic streak in them? It's a little worrying if that's not the case. So in case you do as well, do let me know.

I have my college farewell on the 3rd of March. The whole idea is still slightly surreal. I'm finding it unbelievably difficult to accept the fact the college is, in fact, pretty much over. I'm not feeling sad yet, coz it's not exactly sunk in. Funny. Guess once realization strikes, that'll warrant another post. For the time being, you guys can take a look here and here, to get an idea of what it felt like after 1st year and 2nd year got over, respectively.

What's worrying me more than anything else of late is the thought that the coming year is a closed book. For the first time in my life, i have absolutely no idea where i'm heading. Scary is an understatement. I'm dreading the end of college. *brrrrr*

On a more frivolous note, anyone following Roadies? I am ashamed to admit that every saturday, at 7 pm, i am glued to MTV. But what the hey, they've got some really fascinating people on the show this time. Is anyone hoping that devarshi's the next one to go?

Pardon the digression, i cannot help but digress. It's a failing i've been trying to rein in, but nothing's worked so far. Suggestions on what can be done are welcome.

In any case, i've pretty much lost track of what this post was suppossed to be all about, so we'll leave that for another day. I am awfully sleepy, and awfully glad about the fact that tomorrow is a DUTA strike, so i can sleep in (one reason i'm positive i'll miss DU for; impromptu strikes. :-D).

So until next time, goodbye, and go watch Billu (Barber). You won't yawn more than halpf a dozen times, and you'll help poor Shahrukh Khan recover some of his money. I mean c'mon, do your good deed of the day, the man's recovering from a surgery. I did it, purely out of selfless motives (Actually i went primarily in the hopes that i'd get to see lots of SRK. However, sadly, that did not happen).

P.S. - I went to buy my farewell sari today, n did not find anything. *sob*

My last resort is Fabindia. Pray for me.

God i really am frivolous.

Tag!

2009-02-05T21:45:00.003+05:30

This is a tag, if i can call it that, that i got on facebook (was not even aware that stuff like this existed on social networking sites. :-p). Anyway, it seemed like fun, so i decided to do it here instead. It has no name, so i shall presumptiously give it a name. :-D

So this is the "One Word" tag. Not too original, i accept, but cut me some slack, i'm old now. Anyway, the basic idea is that there are a few (actually QUITE A FEW) questions, which must be answered in one word. So without further ado, here we go.

1. Where is your cell phone? Pocket

2. Your significant other? Fascinating

3. Your hair? Independent

4. Your mother? Incredible

5. Your father? Interesting

6. Your favorite? Deep

7. Your dream last night? Disturbing

8. Your favorite drink? Caffeine

9. Your dream/goal? Happiness

10. What room you are in? Noisy

11. Your hobby? Books

12. Your fear? Loneliness

13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Happy

14. Where were you last night? Home

15. Something that you are not? Loud

16. Muffins? Dee-li-cious

17. Wish list item? B-School......yes i am a geek. :-p

18. Where you grew up? Delhi!! :-D

19. Last thing you did? Ate

20. What are you wearing? Red

21. Your TV? Near-Addiction (2 words i know.....so kill me)

22. Your pets? Strays

23. Friends? Support-system

24. Your life? Fun

25. Your mood? Sleepy

26. Missing some one? Possibly.....

27. Car? Dad's. :-p

28. Something you're not wearing? Watch

29. Your favorite store? Bookstores!!!

30. Your favorite color? Multiple (way too difficult to pick one)

31. When is the last time you laughed? Today

32. Last time you cried? Today (as you can see, i'm manic-deppressive)

33. One place that I go to over and over? Subway!

34. One person who texts me regularly? Rahul

35. My favorite place to eat? Can i pick cuisine-wise? Otherwise the question is unbearably difficult.

36. My favorite food? Refer to previous answer.

I am not tagging anyone, not yet at least. Or no wait, i have a better idea, i tag everyone who comments on this post. Please do not let that stop you from commenting. I promise to not enforce the rule. :-)

Anyway, i am off to have dinner. Mum's getting slightly hysterical. Until next time, goodbye, and good night.

Morrie

2009-02-04T20:19:00.002+05:30

Tuesdays With Morrie is not a book one can read casually on board the U-Special. I learnt that the hard way. You feel sad when the book ends, coz you're not ready to let go just as yet. You wish you'd known someone like Morrie, to help you prioritise things accordingly to what really matters. You want to hold him and laugh with him and learn to cry unabashedly when things go wrong. You want him to tell you if you've been running after the wrong things all along. But most of all you want to cherish everything you have, and value the people around you way more than that new car you've been wanting to buy.

Thank you Morrie, for coming into my life, however brief a period it might have been for.

Back in Business Baby!

2009-01-27T18:55:00.001+05:30

Guess who's back, back again....shady's back, tell a friend!

Well not really, it's actually me who's back, permanently i hope. I beg forgiveness for the unbelievably lame comeback-line. After having disappeared for more than half a year, i'm back; older, quieter and hopefully smarter. :-D

In case you haven't noticed, the name of my blog has changed from "A Day in the Life of an Ordinary Teenager" to "A Day in the Life of an Ordinary Ex-Teenager". Yes, alas, it's true. I am no longer a teen, which means i'm ooooooooooooold! *sob* It's been a while now that i've been 20, so i've had time to get used to the idea. Nevertheless, that does not mean i like it. Hmph. But oh what the hell, it happens to everyone. :-p

Anyway, i guess i owe everyone (or anybody who's still around) an update. So let's see, here goes nothing.

In case you've been paying attention, you must have gathered that i am now 20. So let's not dwell on that anymore.

I am a few months away from graduating. Surreal.

Took a whole bunch of MBA exams and am now hoping to get through someplace decent. At the risk of sounding conceited, it would be pretty sad to end up in a crummy MBA-school after SRCC. In case nothing works out this year, i'll be left with no option but to drop a year, and work. Which i'm really not too keen on doing. Plus i haven't got placed yet. :-p

Have switched from a nosering to a black stud. Mixed responses. Some people liked it. My brother thought i looked like a south-indian fisherwoman. But what the hey, i like it!

Was pleasantly surprised to find out that someone other than Mika or Stereo Nation(!!!) would be performing at Crossroads in my final year in college, and hence would not be forced to go to Polo Grounds or Mecca(the Hindu fest) on pop night. Consequently, nearly got crushed to death in the mad rush that ensued to watch KK perform. Saw Parikrama perform at Hindu, which means i got to see them play all three years as a DU student, for which i am very glad. Take a look here to find out about the beginning of my relationship, if i can call it that, with Parikrama. :-p

Anyway, guess that's enough info for the time being. One must not bore one's readers.

Got back from Jaipur last night. And i am in love with the city. It is a BEAUTIFUL city, and i was sad about having to come back to Delhi. Three days just aren't enough to enjoy the place. I loved everything about Jaipur - the forts and palaces(which are breathtaking), the food, Chokhi Dhani, the camels(!!) plus the hotel we were staying in. It's a haveli converted into a hotel. It was absolutely gorgeous. Anyway, am dying to go back and see the places i missed.

Okay, this has gone on for too long, and i must stop. So i shall vamoose, though only temporarily.

Goodbye, and until next time, enjoy the weather. It's not gonna last!

Tag undone!

2008-05-16T11:54:00.002+05:30

Whaddyaknow, it's TAG TIME! Arunima tagged me twice(!), and i shall attempt to finish one of them today. Being a lazy bum, the second tag will be attended to some other day. Before starting the tag, let's get the preliminaries out of the way. Nothing much to report. It's lovely having nothing constructive to do after more than a month of exams. Life's revolving around sleeping, eating, shopping, meeting up with friends, talking on the phone and IPL to a certain extent. I'm pretty worried about tonight's match. Life's pretty frivolous for the time being, and i'm not complaining. :-D

*sends up a silent prayers for the knights*

I am also a little sick of delhi and need a vacation real bad.

I bought a book called 'Five past midnight in Bhopal' by Dominique Lapierre. I've just started reading it and it's been brilliant so far. I've also rediscovered 'Interpretation of Dreams' (Sigmund Freud, for the uninitiated), and it's making very little sense to me. The dream analyses are fun though. I had tried reading it a few years back and it had made absolutely no sense to me. So i figure i've become smarter since then. Freud has a really gigantic Oedipus fixation. Slightly creepy. But what the hey, it's highly interesting.

I haven't seen a movie in what feels like eons. I wanna go to the movieeessssss!! Except there isn't anything nice to watch, with the exception of Khuda Ke Liye i'm guessing. Is Shaurya any good?

Damn i forgot! I have to take a bath, get dressed and meet a few friends in about 45 minutes. The tag shall have to wait until the next post. Anyway, until then, goodbye and, as my fortune for today on orkut says, you are sociable and entertaining(and don't you forget it! :-p).

The month of May

2008-05-11T20:05:00.003+05:30

It's been 4 days since my exams got over and, unfortunately, i'm already bored. There's only so much TV that one can watch. I bought a pretty pink top from Fabindia and went looking for a new nosering but didn't like anything i saw. I'm stuck with my plain silver ring for the time being. Ate at KFC after very long, They really know their stuff. Been having chocolate icecream everyday. I realize that i prefer the plain chocolate flavour to the chocolate chip one.

Second year of college is over. I'm finding it impossibly hard to believe. I don't feel any different. I still feel like the excited, slightly nervous girl who stepped into SRCC's campus nearly 2 years back. The campus which i've grown to love, which now holds some of the happiest memories of my life. I remember hating the first few months of college(Read about that here). And now the thought of leaving this place in less than a year is well, incredibly sad. I sure as hell will miss the red brick walls. Also, college is comfortable. The big bad world is scary!

People have been telling me i've lost weight. I'm definitely not complaining. Why do adults frown when they tell you that you've lost weight? And they don't seem to like it too much when you happen to look pleased. Also, why do mums think it's essential to feed their kids until they get diabetes? Odd.

Anyway, i'm off. Until next time, goodbye and enjoy the weather.

P.S. - It's a nice change having the knightriders win. I'm happy, to say the least. :-D

Comeback of sorts

2008-05-09T22:34:00.007+05:30

Very very VERY long time, i know. i can explain. Firstly my exams were on for the past one month(yeah ONE WHOLE MONTH. DU exams are a bitch). Secondly, and this is well the real reason, i had become incapable of writing. I couldn't write anything other than mindless trash. And i didn't even feel like writing. Anyway now i feel like writing again, so let's just hope it lasts.

Exams sucked, just for the record. Drowned my sorrows in vodka, which was not that great an idea in hindsight coz i got royally drunk and my head spun for the next 5 hours. Everyone else had fun at my expense though.

The knightriders won yesterday! I am so very happy. :-D

That's all for the time being. Very disjoint and extremely short post i know. But patience, the witticisms will be back in full force. Until then, goodbye and pray for the knightriders!

P.S. - The new colour has nothing to do with my mood. The pink was getting to me, to be honest. :-p

Of politics, books and cold, harsh winds.

2008-02-13T16:11:00.003+05:30

The weather in delhi is finally looking up. Today was gorgeous. Sunny, windy and not too cold. I'm hoping against hope that it lasts. Someone told me that the awful cold was a direct consequence of global warming. Weather conditions are becoming extreme everywhere. That's pretty evident actually, what with bombay being colder than delhi last week. Anyway, if that is the case, then we're in for one hell of the summer this year. Christ........

Nature's way of saying it's payback time, i guess.

This year the weather's really put me off, mainly because i fell ill last week and couldn't go to college, and now my attendance is so fucked up i'll probably have to attend every single bloody class this term. *frowns very hard*

The great bird flu scare came and went, yet the consumption of chicken and eggs in the bhattacharrya household(my household basically) was not affected one bit. Nothing comes between a bengali and his food, clearly. It's a little worrying, honestly. Bengalis love eating, but the extent to which they love it became clear this past one month. The bengalis comprising my family at least. Disconcerting or what.....

I haven't seen a movie in so long. Possibly becasue i haven't heard of a halfway-decent movie in quite some time. I'm wondering what Mithya would be like. Would've watched American Gangster had it not been for Denzel Washington. can't stand the guy for some reason.

Which reminds me, Clinton or Obama? I'm for Barack Obama all the way. Hillary Clinton is too much of a feminist and too Marxist for me and has serious Cummunist leanings (completely my personal opinion of course). I know she's a Democrat and her ideologies will obviously be leftist, but i think Obama is much more balanced, and truly secular, if we come down to that. Anyway, history will be made in any case.

Last week, since i was stuck in bed thanks to my fever, i did lots of reading. Read two excellent books, one by Shashi Tharoor, called 'Riot', and another by John Irving called 'A Prayer For Owen Meany'. 'Riot' is excellent; very well-written and ve-ery unsettling. The narrative is based on the killing of an American woman in the 1987 riots (a direct result of the demands made by the right extremists calling for the rebuilding of the Ram Mandir and the demolition of Babri Masjid).Using this one incident as the base, Tharoor paints a vivid picture of the social scenario and alarming unrest in the country during that time. But it's pretty relevant 20 years later also. The issues are the same, and mindsets have not changed. A darn good read.

'A prayer for Owen Meany' again questions your religious beliefs but in a completely different context. It questions the very essence of your faith, and can be quite disconcerting if you are even slightly religious. Of course, in the book the faith that is being questioned is Christianity, but it works for every religion. The book is about a boy called Owen Meany and how he has unshakable faith in certain things, some quite illogical, even though he is highly intelligent. Another very well-written and slightly disturbing book.

Okay i'm guessing i've bored you enough. I'm gonna stop jumping from one topic to another (i really digress waaay too much). In fact what i'm gonna do is i'm gonna stop talking altother and i'm gonna take off. Do i hear a sigh of relief?

Until next time, goodbye and Happy Valentine's Day. Just for the record, i'm going out with friends from college tomorrow. :-p

Howdy!

2008-01-27T20:20:00.000+05:30

Boy, it's been an awfully long time since i last paid any attention to my poor blog. I realize that i've really missed writing, and even though i may not be terrific with words, i enjoy writing. And so, the Teenager is back, n (hopefully) she's here to stay.

It's been so long that detailed updates will take a horribly long time, and will be mindnumbingly boring. Therefore i shall refrain from bridging the gap, so to speak, from october to, well the present. Howver, i guess some updates are necessary, so let's get that over with.

Let's see. Exams just ended, didn't exactly ace em. Had loads of fun on new year's eve, got completely sloshed. Fest was nice, also saw Parikrama perform in polo grounds, along with Dem Clones. Diwali was nice, though did not burst crackers for the first time in 19 years. And yes, still very much in love. :-)

The weather is really getting to me now. Spring, where art thou? Where's global warming when you need it? Sigh......... I hate gloomy, non-sunny, windy days. I am in love with my heater. And the horrid weather is giving my hair a really hard time. *SOB*

Whoops, mum's calling for dinner, so i'm off. Until next time, which shall be very soon, goodbye, and do not get out of your quilt unless absolutely necessary.

P.S. - a big hello to all my readers, if they still visit this page that is. :-p

Tag

2007-11-01T12:40:00.000+05:30

I've been too lazy (and honestly have had way too many things on my mind. *wink*) to update. And hence, a very big thank you to Arunima for tagging me. Doing a tag is so much easier than writing a post on your own. Saves me the trouble of taxing my brain too much. :-p

Anyway, without further ado, let's begin.

1. Pick out a scar you have, and explain how you got it. - This is so very sad, but i don't have any scars.

2. What does your phone look like? - It looks okay. It's black and grey and it's one of those flip-open phones. I'm indifferent honestly, coz i mainly use it for making/receiving phonecalls and messaging. All that memory's going to waste.

3. What is on the walls of your bedroom? - Nothing, actually. I hate messing up my walls.

My god, i realize this is turning out to be an extremely boring tag. I am an unbelievably boring person. Oh well, let's get this over with.

4. What is your current desktop picture? - Shahrukh Khan. Yay! :-D

5. Do you believe in gay marriage? - Yes. Not just believe in it, but wholeheartedly support it.

6. What do you want more than anything right now? - By right now if you mean this very instant, I'd like a taaall glass of hot chocolate, coz i have a cold and a bit of a headache. *smiles to herself for reasons known best to herself and a certain someone else*

7. Are your parents still together? - Yes.

8. Last person who made you cry? - I'd like to skip this question, honestly. More so because the answer wouldn't make much sense.

9. What is your favorite perfume/cologne? - J'adore by Christian Dior

10. What are you listening to? - "I don't wannna miss a thing" by Aerosmith.

11. Do you get scared of the dark? - Not really. I don't get scared too easily. But of course, Delhi roads aren't exactly comforting in the dark. Or at any time of the day, come to think of it. :-p

12. Do you like pain killers? - What kind of a question is that??? I'm indifferent, honestly.

13. Are you too shy to ask someone out? - Oh yes, you bet. I'm painfully shy.

14. If you could eat anything right now, what would it be? - A looooot of dark chocolate.....sigh......

15. Who was the last person who made you mad? - Let's see....uhhhh......ummm.... the thing is, i don't get pissed too easily. I have a very very pleasant disposition. :-D

16. Who was the last person who made you smile? - God, this is going to sound terribly cliched. My boyfriend. :-p

17. Is someone in love with you? - Yes.....sigh........*blush*

My goodness, i think that was one of my most boring posts ever. Aah well, at least it's done. You can stop yawning now.

Alright, now my turn to do some tagging. I tag Akanksha, Lemonade, Sam and Kenny. And anyone else who'd like to take it up.

Until next time, goodbye and *hmm-hmm-hmm.....* (hums "I don't wanna miss a thing" to herself).

God i really have turned into a sap.

Post-Puja Update

2007-10-22T14:28:00.000+05:30

So yesterday was Dussehra. Which means Durga Puja got over the day before. C. R. Park gets terribly depressing after the Pujas. Empty pandals, dirty roads, lights being taken off; the place looks almost funereal. Depressing is a bit of an understatement, come to think of it.

Found it impossible to drag myself to college today, so decided to bunk. Stupid decision, in retrospect, coz i have nothing to do but mope around at home.

Last week's been excellent. Durga Puja is brilliant in any case, and this year's puja has been exceptionally nice, for more reasons than one. :-)

Last year i remember i'd had serious Durga Puja withrawal symptoms, but this year's not been so bad. N i sure as hell am not complaining.

Back to the same ol' grind from tomorrow. Heaven knows how i'll manage after 20 days of doing nothing constructive whatsoever. It really has been a wonderful month so far. :-D

Anyway, i'm off. Until next time, goodbye and Shubho Bijoya everyone!

Noserings, among other things.

2007-10-09T23:21:00.000+05:30

Well whaddyaknow, a nose piercing DOES look nice on me. :-D

The first couple of days of the hols were mindnumbingly boring, but after that things really picked up, somehow. Obviously, i'm not complaining. Only disturbing bit is the fact that i have studied absolutely nothing so far. And less than a week of the hols are left. Screwed, big time.

Bought a new phone. Finally. Needed one badly. Ever since water got into my last phone and fucked it up, i had been using this very old Nokia 6610 which would fall apart at the drop of a hat and i'd have to reassemble it at the most inopportune moments.

Feeling extremely sleepy, in fact so much so that i'm muddling up all the keys. Thank god for small mercies like Spellcheck.

I've been sleeping way too much lately, nearly 12 hours. I woke up at 1 30 yesterday. It's worrying me a little bit. I actually had to set an alarm to wake up at 11 today. And after that, i felt sleep-deprived the whole day. I hope it's not something serious, this excessive need for sleep.

Anyway, i really can't keep my eyes open any longer, so i'm gonna stop. Until next time, goodbye and enjoy the gorgeous weather. Delhi is lovely in October.

Comfortably Numb....Not!

2007-10-04T12:24:00.000+05:30

I want to switch off my phone, lock myself up in my room with a bunch of books and Pink Floyd for company, and not come out for about a week. Alas, easier said than done.

Going to see Loins of Punjab today. Boredom is setting in. *sob*

I want a pair of skinny jeans. On second thoughts, i need a pair of skinny jeans. Badly.

I'm wondering whether to get my nose pierced or not. Not too sure if it's gonna suit me. What i'd really like to do is get my eyebrow pierced, but the thought of the amount of pain i'll have to bear scares me like hell.

Realized, for the millionth time maybe, that i have ghastly taste in men.

Enough re-revelations for the day. I have to go get ready.

Until next time, goodbye and enjoy yourself till the next dry day which is far far away.

Boredom and Exhilaration

2007-09-29T23:01:00.000+05:30

So my holidays have officially begun. Under normal circumstances i would be ecstatic, but such, unfortunately, is not the case this time. Didn't go to college for 4 days last week and nearly lost my mind due to sheer boredom. So much so that i actually dragged my mum to go see Dhamaal with me.

Incidentally, it is a horrible horrible movie. Please do not ever watch it, not even if you were bored out of your mind. Count the number of strands of hair on your head if you will, but do not under any circumstances go watch Dhamaal. How can people make such awful movies? Do they not go stark raving crazy while they're at it? Oh well.......

Anyway, didn't mean to digress. My point is, if i got so highly bored in four days, what's gonna happen to me during the 15-day long autumn break? The thought's worrying me already. Worst part is, i'll have to get some *shudder* studying done now. Have studied nothing so far this year, and the 1st term is already over.

Also, what with me having now joined IMS, i'll have to do a little bit of studying for that at least. Heaven knows why i've joined IMS. An MBA seemed like the logical thing to do, but now i'm not so sure. Do i really want to do an MBA? And if i do, do i have the drive needed to crack, if not CAT, some reasonably good MBA exam? Oh well, it's too late to ask these questions now. I've committed myself, and now i've got to deal with it.

About my birthday, got lots of lovely presents, including 6 grand from my parents. Rich, i am. :-D

Durga Puja's coming up! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I love Durga Puja, not just because of the food (though that is a major reason) or the meeting-up-with-friends or the staying-up-all-night-4-nights-in-a-row but just because it makes me happy. Wonderfully, inexplicably happy. I walk around with a big grin on my face for about a month before it begins. No clue why. :-D

I've wondered why it makes me feel so cheerful, but i've never been able to satisfactorily explain it. There's something about the festival that is exhilarating. Something in the air i guess. Something almost intoxicating.

Jeez realize that the previous lines sounded awfully cliched so i'm gonna stop now.

Until next time, goodbye, and if you're in DU, enjoy your holidays, and if you're not well then, bad luck my friend. :-p

P.S. - This is my 75th post. Platinum jubilee did someone say? *champagne bottles are popped and confetti is showered from the skies*

Of Vodka Shots and Lots Of Firsts

2007-09-24T11:48:00.000+05:30

*sheepish grin*

Had an excellent birthday.

Yes, seriously. :-D

Let's see. The day started off on a wonderful note. The macro test went off without a glitch, thanks to Isha. Love her. :-)

Did not attend the IMS class. For reasons which will become clear in a while.

Wore a white and pink floral skirt.

GOT DRUNK (for the first time ever). Woohoooooo! :-p

Anisha and I share our birthdays. So we took everyone out for lunch. Went to cafe 100, and were told that we'd have to wait for 40 minutes. Headed to Berco's, where we were told that we'd have to wait for 45 minutes. Felt extremely pissed and settled for Pizza Hut. Where Anisha had a showdown with one of the waiters. I have to admit, the guy was EXTREMELY rude. We wanted to walk out but had nowhere else to go so we swallowed our indignance (and pride) and kept sitting.

(incidentally, anisha and i coincidentally ended up wearing the same same top. heard cracks about how the birthday girls had dressed up the same way and had to explain about a million times to about a million different people how it wasn't planned, that it was just a coincidence)

Interestingly, the gang got us lots of goodies from Wengers, instead of the usual cake, which was really nice. So we cut a doughnut, while everyone sang happy birthday for us. :-)

And that's when things got interesting. After we were done with lunch, we all headed to Castle Nine to actually celebrate turning 19.

We were given the ol' couple's lounge, much to the chagrin of all the couples, coz the regular seating area was full. Spoiled a lot of cosy dates, that's for sure. There's not much you can do with a roudy bunch of college kids on a sugar (and soon to be alcohol) high all around.

I, who have never consumed any alcohol in the true sense (unless sips from dad and half a peg with lots of Pepsi counts) ordered two vodka shots at the very onset. Downed the first one, felt perfectly fine, and hence proceeded to gulp down the second one too.

Bad idea, in retrospect. Immediate effect, slight nausea. Which knocked some sense into me, and i decided to stop, at least for a while. Did not puke, thankfully.

Sat sipping at a highly diluted glass of vodka, feeling extremely happy and at peace with the world. Did happen to notice that i was talking more and a little louder than usual, but didn't let that bother me too much.

There's a very thin line separating joie de vivre and insanity (or drunkenness, for that matter), as i happened to find out. The next 15 minutes is slightly hazy. All i remember is laughing like a maniac for no evident reason, and talking A LOT. Everyone else had a lovely time, laughing at my expense, and (this is the worst bit) making videos of me making a fool of myself! Wonderful friends i have, i tell you.

At some point i remember asking the bartender to do tricks for me, in honour of it being my birthday.

Apparently i was the only one who got drunk drunk, seeing how i was the only one drinking for the first time.

Awfully awfully embarrassing, but loads of fun as well. :-D

Managed to sober up, thank heavens. Girija said i was in no position to go home alone. No telling what i might do. :-p

So she offered to drop me home halfway. That did not work out, coz it started pouring after a while. First time in 19 years it ever rained on my birthday. So i went to her place (after being warned to not do anything stupid. she could not take home a drunk girl) and dad picked me up from there.

Reached home, soaking wet and feeling terribly ill. Mum popped a thermometer in my mouth, and as you will have it, i was running a temperature of a hundred and three.

Testimony to the *ahem* wild birthday i had maybe? :-p

[ Added later - Forgot to mention, did do an impromptu dance in front of Castle Nine after leaving. :-p]

Ain't birthdays just brilliant?

2007-09-17T18:31:00.000+05:30

Well my birthday week's got off to a flying start. Wasn't feeling too well last night, mum checked my temperature and as you will have it, i had fever. Didn't go to college today, got bored to the high heavens and cribbed nonstop.

Now let's talk about what my birthday's going to be like, shall we?

Let's see, i have a bloody macro test that day (incidentally i have attended about 4 macro classes in the whole term; it's like god's subtle way of telling me something). Two of my closest friends won't be in town. Aaand my IMS classes begin that day. Bet the day's gonna be oodles of fun.

Bit of a contrast to last year's birthday.

You must've guessed by now that i'm not at my chirpiest best. Not least because of the fact that my head is pounding right now and my nose is all blocked. And that i'm bored.

For the past one week I've been trying to work up the courage to talk to this cute guy who travels by my bus. One reason that i haven't been able to do it so far is the fear that he might be a first year student. But i have to admit, the major reason is sheer timidity. I happen to be painfully shy. :-p

Anyway, i'm off. Until next time, goodbye, and have a wonderful week ahead. Mine's going to be just dandy.

P.S. - My birthday's on the 21st of September, just for the record.

P.P.S. - Guess an explanation for the deleted story is warranted. Pretty simple explanation. Had put it up mainly as a sort of joke at a friend's expense. And had used some, let's say, politically incorrect names for the characters. The friend wasn't too happy about the whole thing, and hence i took it off. Might put it up again using different names.

Tall Tales

2007-09-05T21:43:00.000+05:30

Lots of things happening but no time to update. Lots of firsts in the past couple of weeks. Will mention those in another post, am running short of time.

Oh and an announcements of sorts. Collected Short Stories will be revived, albeit only temporarily. For the uninitiated, those are 'anecdotes' so to speak picked up from my own life. :-p

You might wanna take a look at the following.

Story 1 : the one with the same phones
story 3: the one where i screw up!! (only read the 2nd story, not the first one)
Story 4 : the one where i'm 'his love' (not too interesting, but it holds a soft spot in my heart. :-p)
Story 5 : The one with the offer of friendship (hilarious. DO read it. DO!!)
Story 6 : The one where the ironies of life are revealed. (extremely long. read it only if you have a lot of time on your hands)

Not much of a post, and i apologise for that. I promise the next post will more than make up for it (or so i hope at least. Lol)

Anyway, i'm off for now, got some studying to do (which in most probability will not happen as i will either fall asleep or find the newspaper WAY more engrossing). Until next time, goodbye, and happy reading my stories.

Shooting The Breeze

2007-08-24T22:44:00.000+05:30

Realize i've been blogging very infrequently of late, and feel slightly guilty about that. So here i am, struggling through another entry, even though i have nothing of any significance to say. But seeing how i have a pretty decent knack for bullshitting, i'm gonna struggle some more.

Been running out of my macro class every single time after giving attendance for the past fortnight. The fact that we have two doors helps matters greatly. Gave me a real adrenalin rush the first 4-5 times (yes, i had never run out of a class before....i can hear you snigger. :-x), but now, frankly, it's getting to be a bit of a drag. Tried running out of micro today, but the professor's a real jerk, kept looking up every 5 minutes. Idiot.

The lousy weather is really getting me down. Travelling to college these days is such a major hassle anyway, i can't deal with that along with crummy weather. *sob*

I've got a spanking new bright pink 4 GB ipod! Yippieeeeee. :-D

Best part? My brother's never gonna borrow it, seeing how it's pink. Double yippieeeeeeeee.

My birthday's coming up in less than a month. Triple......you catch my drift. Just that, despite the crummy weather, i've been in a pretty good mood lately. Let's hope it lasts. Coming back to my birthday, for the uninitiated, it's on the 21st of September, and i happen to share it with a very good friend of mine. So we'll celebrate together, and it will be So. Much. Fun. :-)

Last year as a teenager. Better make the most of it. *sigh*

Guess what i've kept as my display name on orkut at present. Keep in mind the facts that Chak De India has recently been released, and that i'm inordinately fond of one particular actor.

Shahrukh is sooooooo yummy! Self explanatory. :-p

Also, I've realized there's more (so much more.....lol) to The Doors than just 'Roadhouse Blues' and Jim Morrison. Brilliant band, brilliant music and absolutely brilliant lyrics (courtesy Morrison; he wrote most of their songs). You might wanna listen to some of their stuff, especially their first album (self-titled).

And now i'm feeling inexplicably sleepy, so i'm gonna cut the crap.

Until next time (which shall be very soon, hopefully), goodbye and go watch Chak De!

P.S. - To get you started off on The Doors, here's the link to the video of the first Doors' song i ever heard. Not 'Light My Fire', just for the record. Do take a look.

Wind of Change

2007-08-16T18:04:00.000+05:30

Funny how things change behind your back without you finding out until it's too late. And funny how you think you're perfectly okay with the idea of change, but then you realize that you're not, and that change scares the shit out of you.

And funny how you never seem to learn that some things just can't be helped.

I never realized it, but my life's followed a pretty steady path so far. I've lived in the same city all my life, same house even. I've never changed schools, was in the same school for 13 years. Still hang out with pretty much the same set of friends, people i've know for quite a few years (except for my college friends of course, seeing how i've only been in college for about a year). Like the same actor i've liked ever since i was inducted into the world of movies. My favorite cuisine's been the same for the past 15 years. (Shahrukh Khan and Chinese respectively, just for the record).

I guess that's made me a little too complacent. And a little sensitive to change. Better start getting used to it.

Anyway, i'm done cribbing. so i'm gonna take off. Will go have my 6th Snickers of the day (there really shouldn't be so much chocolate in the fridge, especially when you're not exactly in the best of moods).

Until next time, good bye, and a belated Happy Independence Day to everyone (i'm gonna spare everyone and not talk about how it's lost it's relevance in today's times).

Tag!

2007-08-03T15:47:00.000+05:30

So i finally get down to doing a looooooong overdue tag. Both Jahanbi and Arunima had tagged me, that too about a month and a half back, so i better get down to it.

5 of my favorite characters from books.

1. Holden Caulfied from 'The Catcher in the Rye'. My favorite-est character ever. The way he was completely messed up in his head, the compulsive lying, the crazy swearing, the (so-called) teenage angst, i love everything about him. At the risk of sounding cliched, in all of us there's a little bit of Holden Caulfied. :-p

2. Arthur Dent from 'The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy'. Yeah i know most people prefer Ford Prefect, coz he's funnier and wittier and cooler, but Arthur is just such a sweetheart. I feel so sorry for him, the way his life keeps getting fucked up as soon as some semblance of order is established. And he's such a naive, helpless thing.

3. Atticus Finch, from 'To Kill a Mockingbird'. Self-explanatory.

4. Rhett Butler, from 'Gone With the Wind'. Though i didn't thing the book was anything extraordinary, i loved Rhett's character. He was so suave, so hot. ;-)

5. Hamlet from, well, Hamlet. Even though he's full of faults, his intensity is extremely appealing. And the fact that he might be slightly mad makes him highly interesting.

Alright, i know that the tag only calls for 5, but i can't help but include a sixth character.

6. Scout, from 'To Kill a Mockingbird'. Yes i know, 2 characters from the same book. I like the book THAT much. She's a brilliant kid. Perceptive, smart, witty. That's the kid i always wanted to be. :-p

Alright, now that's done. My turn to do some tagging. I tag Aditya, Diya, J and Sahaj.

Goodbye all!

Random Ramblings

2007-07-26T21:35:00.000+05:30

So, wedding's over. Lots of fun n all that. Will spare you the boring details ( details of family gatherings and weddings and festivals, however fun you might have had, are highly boring for people who weren't there). Uncle and his wife have gone to Bali for 16 days(!!!!!!!) for their honeymoon, where they'll be staying in a private villa with its own private swimming pool.

I want to get married too!

Well not really, i just want to stay in a private villa with a swimming pool.

*imagines herself frolicking about in the sun with a drink in one hand, feels ridiculously pleased*

Alright, back to real life.

Results out. Did pretty decently. :-D

Got a new hairdo. Looked terrific the day i got it. Looks nothing but messy now.

Very sleepy right now. Am taking off.

Until next time, goodbye and please tell me you didn't queue up at 6:30 in the morning to buy HP.

Spreading the Joy

2007-07-17T20:53:00.000+05:30

Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy college has finally reopened! :-D

And i'm feeling too lazy to write a longish post, so i'm gonna pass this time round.

Uncle's getting married this weekend so double yay!

I'm happy.

I'm Okay

2007-07-14T18:01:00.000+05:30

Don't have too much time at the moment, just wanted to let everyone know i'm perfectly fine now. The birds are singing and the sky is blue everything is alright with the world and all that jazz. :-p

A combination of frustration and pms i'm guessing, which lasted for a day. Thanks for the concern. :-)

Oh and for the record, i watched Harry Potter first day first show. I've never done that for any movie before, and i'm not even that big a fan! More on that later.

Until next time, goodbye and yay monsoon is finally here! :-D

Rant

2007-07-10T21:24:00.000+05:30

I'm bored and annoyed and irritable and hungry.

Go on then, piss me off. I dare you.

I Hear You

2007-07-04T20:16:00.000+05:30

I seem to have got some pretty bad feedback about the new *ahem* template, and okay, maybe it's a tad mismatched. :-p

But hey i happen to really like it! And i was so frikkin bored with the old one i desperately wanted a new template. And in my opinion, pink and blue looks pretty nice. So there!

No wait, i have a better idea. How about you guys (the public, effectively. lol) come up with the colour combination for my template? Oooh boy, this is gonna be fun. Okay here's what the general idea is. You guys come up with a two-colour combination, and i promise to put up all of them, one by one. Deal?

And whichever looks the best stays for good (unless all of them look crappy. which means i revert back to the original pink-blue template).

College reopens in about ten days. Wedding's coming up in about fifteen. Life's gonna get busy real soon. And i'm not talking about fuck-i-wish-i-could-just-die busy, but yay-life's-looking-good busy. :-D

Aaaaand, my driving lessons have begun. After months of procrastination and getting up late and not being in town and just being plain lazy, they have FINALLY begun. Today was my first day, and all i can say is, DRIVING'S IN MY BLOOD. :-p

Okay let's not go that far. Let's just say that I had an absolutely terrific time. Driving is So. Much. Fun.

Well that's about it for now. Life's been running on first gear (hah! car-speak. :-p) for a while so my posts have become a little jaded. Need to liven them up....

Anyway i'm off, this delectable chocolate tart is calling out to me.

Until next time, goodbye and enjoy the fleeting good weather.

On a Rainy Day

2007-06-28T17:08:00.000+05:30

My kid brother narrated to me, what he called, a non-veg joke for the very first time a few days ago. Now you may have read about my brother in a previous post of mine. If you haven't, go take a look here. And even if you have, you might as well take a look still, just for basic background info.

Here's how the conversation went, more or less.

Deep (that's my brother, for the uninitiated) - Didi, wanna hear a joke?

Me - Sure, go ahead.

Deep - Well, i gotta warn you, it's got explikit language.

Me (a little worried, but trying not to show it) - Deep it's not explikit, it's explicit. You pronounce it like an 'S'.

Deep - Aah okay. Well anyway, you wanna hear it?

Me (a little reluctantly) - Yeah okay. Go on.

And then, as you will have it, he proceeds to tell me an extremely silly joke with, yes, a lot of profanities, thankfully in English (i have no idea what i would've done if he'd told me one with Hindi swear words). I will spare you the joke.

I force out a weak giggle, which unfortunately encourages him, coz then he asks me if i'd like to hear another one.

I decline the offer, using the dire need to make a call right then as an excuse (rather weak i know, but i was clutching at straws).

Whew, i find it slightly hard to hold a conversation with Deep these days without discovering something new about him (as well as myself for that matter. for instance, the fact that swear words could make me cringe. that was new)

Anyway, i saw Ocean's Thirteen today. Pretty nice movie, much better than Twelve. Brad Pitt looks a little jaded (but then i never liked him much anyway. always preferred Tom Cruise). George Clooney is hot as ever. And Al Pacino is fabulous. Worth a watch.

Am reading A Hundred Years of Solitude at present (along with H2G2 of course). Heavy, but very entertaining reading. My first book by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Now i realize what the hype about him is all about.

Wonderful weather today. After catching the movie we drove around for a while. It was really nice. Delhi looks so pretty when it rains.

I'm all talked (or shall we say typed) out now so i'm gonna stop.

Until next time, goodbye and yes they do get the diamonds (hah ruined Ocean's Thirteen for you. :-p).

[ Added Later - Forgive me for the lame title. I'm not at my wittiest best right now. :-D ]

Of Procrastination, Blasphemy, Dares and Shopping

2007-06-24T15:28:00.000+05:30

I've been feeling real lazy lately, so much so that blogging actually seems like a chore (okay sacrilege, blasphemy n all that but i don't really care). Anyway, i've been feeling a little guilty about that, so i'm gonna write a reeeaaaaal long entry today (or i'll try real hard at least). And since i don't really have anything to write about in particular, it's gonna be long-winded, boring, disjoint ramblings. So you've been warned.

My uncle's wedding is coming up in july. So people at home have been shopping like there's no tomorrow. I never thought i'd say this, but i'm a little sick of shopping now. I flatly refused to accompany mum today for what must be the millionth shopping trip in the last couple of weeks.

I really enjoyed the first 3-4 days of shopping, mainly because all my stuff was bought then. :-p
I bought 3 saris, beeaaaauuuutiful all of them. And yes i'll spare you, i'm not gonna describe them in minute detail, though i'm extremely tempted to do so. Tell you what, i'll describe them in a footnote, so you have the option of not having to read it. I also bought a lovely pair of very delicate sandals, and gave a salwar kurta for stitching. So basically i have lots of very pretty new clothes AND a new pair of shoes. :-D

What actually made me nearly lose my mind was the marathon jewellery shopping that happened yesterday. We left home at 12 noon and came back at 8 in the night! 8 frikkin hours! Dad was sick by the end of it, i started cribbing at about 3 o' clock (which resulted in mum asking dad to buy me something. Now i'm the proud owner of a very pretty pair of star shaped gold earrings. They're tiny and extremely classy), and mum had a lovely time all through.

Another thing which i thought i'd never say (what do you know, it's been a week of revelations), but i'm quite sick of going out everyday. I haven't been home a single day (well except for today) ever since i got back from Ooty. If it's not shopping, it's meeting up with friends, watching movies, eating out and well just hanging out in general. And now i'm heartily sick of the whole thing. I'm gonna stick around at home for a few days. Sleep, read, listen to music. Cut down my talking-on-the-phone too. I have to admit, i've been yakking on the phone waaaaaaaaaay too much lately. One of the very few times i agree with mum.

Oh incidentally, The Kiterunner in a brillaint book, and right up there with my other favorites. I'm gonna buy Khaled Hussaini's new book now. The man writes wonderfully.

These days i have nothing new to read, except some old Archies that i dug up, so i'm rereading the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy again. And rediscovering Douglas Adams' sheer comic genius. Though i still like P.G. Wodehouse better anyday, but Adams comes a close second.

While we're on the topic of books, i wanted to ask, how's Kafka? I've never read anything by him, but i've heard he's supposed to be pretty good.

Anyway, right now (and for the next 48 hours) my profile name on orkut is "Why do girls suck?". Wondering why? Well it's a dare. Wondering why that particular name? That's too long a story, and i'll tell you guys about it in some other post.

Wondering why i'm so stupid to have actually accepted an inane dare like that? Well the person who dared me agreed to keep a name which i'd come up with if only i kept this one as mine. And it was a little bit of a win-win situation for me, coz he'd already kept two (quite unflattering)names which i'd come up with without making me do anything. Presently he's known as "Deep down, sex scares the shit out of me!". :-p

I can go on longer, but i feel like reading H2G2, so i'm gonna stop (heaving a sigh of relief aren't you?) and I'm gonna let you continue doing whatever you were doing prior to coming to my blog.

Until next time, goodbye, and remember, the solution to all your problems is 42.

Footnote : You really thought i'd forget about the footnote? Hah, wishful thinking. Alright, so the sari i'm going to wear on the wedding is a kora silk. It's deep pink in colour, and it's sort of got two pink shades. The border and the 'aanchal' have delicate gold work on them.
The reception sari is a black kanjeevaram. It's a very light kanjeevaram, almost sheer. And it's got maroon and gold work on the border and the "aanchal', and very light maroon designing on the whole body, few and far apart. Let's just say it's one of the most beautiful saris i've ever seen. It's absolutely gorgeous.
Okay, coming to the third one, it's meant for a function which bengalis have in the afternoon, a couple of days after the wedding, called 'boubhaat'. It's a purple cotton sari, very simple, and very pretty. :-)

All in all, i'm very happy with all the saris. :-D

(I'm not gonna describe the salwar kurta (not yet at least), coz i don't feel like right now.)

Unintended Sabbatical

2007-06-15T22:13:00.000+05:30

O-kayyyyyyyyyy, so the reason i haven't blogged in a ve-ery long time is because

I wasn't in town for about eight days. Had gone to ooty. Absolutely lovely place, had a nice lazy family vacation. Nearly wept when the pilot told us it's 47 degrees in Delhi.
My net was on the blink till today. Almost went nuts, honestly.

Well that's that, and well, i'm back. About a month of hols left. Looking forward to college, but sure as hell not looking forward to the results. Unfortuntely the two seem to go hand in hand. Stupid technicalities.

Started reading this brilliant book yesterday, Kiterunner, and haven't been able to put it down. It's absolutely amazing. And now that i mention it, it's lying in front of me and practically calling out to me.

So what i'm gonna do is, i'm gonna cut this post short, and i'm gonna go read Kiterunner, and i'm gonna write a proper post next time round. What you can do is, you can take a look here. SO WHAT if you couldn't go to Bangalore???? All hail youtube! Who needs a live concert when you've got Aerosmith singing for you right on your computer screens.

*tries to believe what she's just written is in fact completely true but fails miserably. regrets being a delhiite for the very first time in her life (no wait, what about the roger waters gig? and the rolling stones? and iron maide......oh what the helllllllllll) and bangs her head against the screen*

Goodbye all, i have a rendezvous with the Kiterunner.

Random

2007-05-27T21:41:00.000+05:30

I'm bored. And slightly pissed. Just got back home after watching Cheeni Kum for the second time. And it isn't exactly the kind of movie you can watch twice, that too twice in a span of three days.

The first time round it was still bearable, funny in parts. This time it was sheer torture, sitting through the movie. Thanks to mommy dearest, who booked my ticket without informing me.

Now i know it's got pretty good ratings n all, but i found it highly boring. And the people i went with the first time (mum quite liked it. women, i tell you) will second that (except for nitish that is, who quite liked it. :-p).

Anyway, this isn't a review, so i'm gonna stop talking about that movie, and talk about something else instead.

Hmm, let's see. I'm really really bored right now. First time i've felt bored since the hols have begun. Not bad actually, almost a month without being hit by boredom. I'm quite proud of myself.

I've been real confused lately. About some real important stuff. And that's not really a good thing. I've done enough of soul-searching and all that and it's not helping. It's all clear-cut and black and white, as long as those things called feelings don't come into the picture. Jeez......

As soon as i start taking some semblance of a decision, something happens which, as you may have it, messes with my head all over again. Annoying is an understatement. I'm liable to lose my mind pretty soon.

Wish things could be a little less complicated, honestly.

Okay, enough of the melodrama already. I'm gonna quit pissing you guys off and i'm gonna change the subject.

.
.
.
.
.
.
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Can't believe it. For some reason, my mind is drawing a complete blank. Either the boredom is getting to me, in which case there isn't much i can do, or the too-much-of-unnecessary-thinking is getting to me, in which case i need psychiatric help.

I'm gonna cut the crap now, been bullshitting long enough. You can go do something more productive than reading my blog (do you realize that this entry has served no purpose whatsoever except for having wasted a hell lot of your time? :-p).

Until next time, goodbye. It's been nice knowing you.

P.S. - arunima, you've been tagged!!!! :-p

Khasmanu Khanya

2007-05-19T16:58:00.000+05:30

Okay, the reason i haven't blogged in a while is because...i was on my first unchaperoned trip!!!! And it was So. Much. Fun. Seven of us went to Amritsar for a couple of days and we had the whackiest time ever!

Incidentally, i might not have even gone for the trip. i suddenly developed fever the day before we were supposed to leave. And mum categorically told me that there was no way i would travel with fever. I whined, yelled, even shed a few tears, but to no avail. Our train was at 7:20 AM in the morning. Next morning mum woke me up at around five-ish to check my temperature, and what do you know, i didn't have fever!!! I whooped with joy and mum did my packing in thirty minutes flat (how in heaven's name do they do stuff like that???) and off we were, to New Delhi Railway Station. I frantically messaged everyone to let them know that i would, in fact, be able to make it (thank god Girija didn't get my tickets cancelled), all the while grinning widely.

There is no way i can even begin to explain the amount of fun we had (and thankfully i was perfectly fine during the trip...wonder why i had fever for a day). It was WILD.

There are some extremely *ahem* interesting photos, as well as ve-ery interesting videos (videos courtesy anisha, the idiot. and since she was videotaping us, there are no embarrassing videos of her. dammit) of us, which we cannot possibly show to anyone.

I've been nicknamed TGIF, thanks to my capabilities for entertaining people. Thing is, my Hindi isn't too good. So i usually avoid talking in Hindi (for the record, this is because I'm Bengali). And these guys happen to know this. So what they did was, (amongst various other things. mean things!), they forbid me from talking in English the whole of that night. AND made me translate different, and very interesting sentences into Hindi. AND made me swear in Hindi. AND made audio and video clips of that. Wonderful friends i have, i tell you. Incidentally, I'm hoping everyone got the significance of TGIF (watch Bheja Fry if you didn't).

And oh, the food...... Amritsar has absolutely fantastic food! We ate like food was going out of fashion. Man.....

And yeah, an extremely funny thing happened to us. Our car was chased by a bunch of guys in their car real late at night! Half of us freaked out and the other half couldn't stop laughing. :-p

Of course, we did the usual touristy things as well. We visited the golden temple both the days. It's beautiful, especially at night. And we saw the Wagah border, and Jallianwallah Bagh, and the museum of Ranjit Singh. It was really nice.

If seven girls can have so much fun in two days in Amritsar, I can't even begin to imagine the kind of fun we're gonna have in Goa, for a week, with the whole college. Whoopieeeeeeee!!!!!

P.S. - the title has no connection whatsoever with the post, except for the fact that it's the only punjabi phrase (along with a couple of not-so-nice words. :-p) that i've learnt in Amritsar. It means go to hell. :-D Have a nice day everyone.

Retrospection

2007-05-12T20:02:00.000+05:30

Well well well, so my first year in college is over. A little hard to believe, coz I still feel new to college. But at the same time, I feel extremely attached to it, which, honestly speaking, I never thought would happen...

This one year has been one hell of a year, in more ways than one.

The first, and most obvious one, the transition from school to college. The first couple of months were pretty hard, to tell you the truth. I’d been in the same school for thirteen years, so it was practically like my second home, a place where I knew everyone and everyone knew me. And then came college, where nobody knew me and nobody cared, where I had to make a conscious effort to talk to people, to make friends. I was SO not used to that.

Missed school like hell in the beginning, disliked college like hell, would rush home as soon as classes ended, started valuing home like never before. :-p

But then, I gradually started enjoying college, started looking forward to coming to college, started wanting to stick around longer.

And then, one fine day, I realized that I had actually started loving college. I loved the dull red bricks of the building, the Xerox lawns, where a lot of my time was spent, even though I wasn’t part of dramsoc, Irfan’s, whose banta was to die for, the awfully dingy excuse for a canteen, the dayski point, and of course, the beautiful frontlawns, where most of my first year was spent, where so many vital issues were discussed, like UCB’s gorgeous winter collection, our love-lives, Jha’s havoc-wreaking tests, bad-hair days, where mine and Anisha’s Campus Improvement Programme (read - an excuse for bitching) materialized, where I grew to love SRCC.

Now if I look back, the thought that I actually used to hate college at one point of time is almost absurd. Funny how things change………..

Also, funny how priorities change. What seemed liked the most important thing a year back seems pretty insignificant now. Of course, using the same logic, what seems really important right now will cease to matter a year later I guess.

Incidentally, I’ve learnt a couple of things, albeit the hard way (which is how most learning experiences go I think. :-p). Actually on second thoughts, I’m going to leave that for another entry, coz this is getting a little too pensive as it is.

So until next time, goodbye, and thanks for all the fish.

Of generation gaps and awkward conversations

2007-05-04T22:54:00.000+05:30

Okay, this was actually supposed to be a part of the last entry, but sleep overcame me, so to speak, and i didn't get anywhere close to broaching the topic which i am about to, well, broach, now.

This entry is going to be about a highly interesting (highly interesting according to me, at least) conversation i had with my brother a while back. Before i proceed, a little bit of background info.

My brother is 13 years old (will turn 14 in july), is learning to play the drums, has an extremely high opinion of himself, listens to rock (thanks to me) and nu-metal (thanks to god knows who), is now taller than me, wants to grow his hair long and is a general nuisance and quite a smartass. Basically the usual teenage boy.

Coming to the actual conversation (keep the aforementioned things in mind while reading). A few months ago, i walked into the room where the computer's kept and saw him using it. I sat around waiting for him to finish whatever he was doing coz i needed to use it too.

Incidentally, in the past few months, we've started to get along pretty well and talk quite often. So generally we started talking, about this and that.

Then, in the middle of our conversation, he's like, "jeez, i'm so bored of porn man". Now i'm a pretty open-minded big sister (he'd showed me the finger at the dinner table when he was in the 4th grade and i hadn't said a word. My dad did ask him to NEVER do that rude gesture ever again....) and i know it's perfectly normal for boys his age (or any age for that matter) to watch porn, but i wasn't exactly prepared for the i'm-bored-of-porn bit.

But still, to keep the lines of communication open, and to be broadminded about the whole thing, i started telling him how it's completely normal for people to watch porn, and how everyone goes through this stage but how one should be careful to not let things out of hand (whatever that meant!!). He came back with a " i know didi, c'mon, i'm not a kid you know".

Feeling chastised, i decided to shut up and mind my own business when he asked me, "so you must've watched porn too right?". Now for the record, i HAVEN'T. The only thing that i've seen remotely related to anything like that was the dps video (which wasn't exactly a pleasant experience, honestly speaking). Anyway, after sitting with my mouth open for about ten seconds, i again told him the oh-everyone-goes-through-that-stage bit.

He wasn't very impressed with my answer but decided to let it pass (thank god!!). I was hoping that that would be the end of our little tete-a-tete but of course, it wasn't. He started telling me about how exactly he gets hold of the porn, when his friends started watching porn (either he didn't tell me when he started or my memory has sort of blocked it out), how it's no big deal (kid brother telling older sister porn is no big deal. What is the world coming to?) etc etc etc.

Before he could reach the inevitable, "didi where do babies come from?" (knowing fully well where exactly they came from and how exactly they come about. I know for a fact he's had 'that conversation' with an adult.), i decided to make my escape and sneaked out of the room when he got a little too engrossed in his Age Of Empires game (thank heaven's he wasn't watching porn in front of me!).

Now i've been dragged into a lot of amazingly uncomfortable conversations, but this one features amongst the top three.

Wonder if he's still bored of porn though........

Woohoo!

2007-05-02T01:10:00.000+05:30

And they're over. After days of hopelessness and and procrastination and cursing oneself (as well as the world at large) and hating eco and sleepless nights and lots of coffee and all that jazz, they're finally over. Also the fact that i did quite decently, except in one paper, adds to my already overflowing exuberance.

Incidentally, Bheja Fry is frikkin hilarious and the funniest thing i've seen in a long LONG time. No slapstick shit, situational comedy at it's best.

This post was supposed to be much MUCH longer but i am EXTREMELY sleepy and i can't quite figure out the keys anymore (thank god for small mercies like spellcheck) so i'm gonna stop and i'm gonna crawl into bed and i'm gonna write another entry tomorrow (which will be longer and will (hopefully) contain something of some substance and will not have parenthesised parentheses).

Until then, goodbye, and it's nice to be back! :-)

The Tag : Have you ever...?

2007-04-05T18:22:00.000+05:30

Yeah I know I know i wasn't supposed to post anything before the exams got over, but hey, one tiny(or maybe not so tiny) post won't hurt. And this is positively the last one, coz i really can't afford to blog for a long long time, not if i want a first division.

Anyway, i came across this really interesting tag, and felt like doing it, so i decided to tag myself. Yes, lame, i know. Humour me.

Okay then, here goes nothing.

HAVE YOU EVER.......

Smoked a cigarette?: Alas no, never tried even.

Crashed a friend's car?: The fact that i don't know how to drive(yet) would've facilitated the whole crashing-a-friend's-car bit, but unfortunately none of my friends have ever lent me their cars (and after reading this, I'm sure they never will).

Stolen a car?: Nope, and i get the feeling I'd be quite sucky at it. Maybe I'll give it a shot once i learn how to drive. :-p

Been in love?: Love? hmm.....love? I don't think so. Unless you count Shahrukh Khan (yes i love him).

Been dumped?: Yes, once. :-(

Shoplifted?: Nope. and don't want to, somehow. To tell you the truth, the idea scares me. Lol.

Been in a fist fight?: Well it's been a long long time since I've been in one. But yeah, i have. In quite a few in fact, when i was a kid (clearly, i wasn't a very nice kid).

Snuck out of your parent's house?: Nope. Sad.......

Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back?: Of course. hasn't everyone?

Been arrested?: Haven't ever done anything illegal. Except for jaywalking maybe. Is that even a crime in India? God i really am sad..... Oh wait! Does drinking (and here i mean drinking in the mildest sense of the word) alcohol before you're 18 count?

Gone on a blind date?: I once went on what i can only call a 'triple blind date'. And i knew one of the guys from before and both the other girls. It turned out to be a lot of fun actually....

Skipped school?: Well, once. And I don't think it even qualifies as skipping school coz we went to school and then left from there. Shit this is seriously embarrassing.

Been on a plane?: Yeah, and i absolutely love it. Every single time.

Seen someone die?: No

Been to Canada?: Nope (isn't this an awfully random question? Why Canada? WHY Canada of all places?)

Purposely set a part of yourself on fire?: No, i know I'm quite *ahem* unusual, but not that unusual. I have done the whipping-your-finger(s)-quickly-through-a-flame thing about a million times though (and still do...sometimes). But I'm sure everyone's done it and that's not what they're asking really.

Been jet-skiing?: Aww no.... :-(

Met someone in person from the Internet?: Nope. the idea is a little scary, to be honest.

Taken pain killers?: Yeah, doesn't everyone? Oh wait a second.....now i get it. Nope not taken painkillers like that.

Flown a kite?: Yup. And i can proudly say that i can actually get it up in the air. :-D

Built a sand castle?: Yup. In goa babyyyy. And in Australia, but i was ten years old, so it doesn't count.

Gone puddle jumping?: Yup. Still do in fact. Much to the chagrin of the people around me.

Cheated while playing a game?: Sure, hasn't everyone? Except while playing relay!!!(inside joke...most people won't get it. Don't bother)

Been lonely?: Yes. There's a difference between being alone and being lonely. I'm quite comfortable when I'm alone. I don't need company for reassurance. You know that feeling you get when you're surrounded by people and you still feel alone? That's what loneliness is, according to me at least. It's happened to me a few times. And it's scary.

Fallen asleep at work or school/college?: Only about a million times already. Used to fall asleep in every single FIITJEE class; could not keep my eyes open, however much i tried. Thank god they had large classrooms. Haven't ever really fallen asleep in school, coz the rooms weren't that big, and the idea of getting caught napping and getting publicly made fun of did not appeal too much to me. Never fallen asleep in college coz we end up playing stupid games at the back. Though i must admit, Anita Mathur has a lovely soothing voice.

Used a fake ID?: Naa. Someday maybe....

Felt an earthquake?: You know, funnily enough, even though i stay in Delhi, I've never felt an earthquake. I've always managed to sleep through them. Weird.....

Touched a snake?: Yeah, in a touch pool in Singapore. Felt unlike anything I'd ever touched before. And felt completely unlike what i expected it to feel like. Not slimy that is.

Slept beneath the stars?: Never. :-( Really want to someday though.

Been robbed?: No thank god. Quite surprising really, seeing how I'm not the most careful of people.

Been misunderstood?: Have i ever. God, my life practically thrives on misunderstandings. People sort of tend to assume I'm being mean, even when I'm not. And when I'm actually putting them down, they don't get it! Quite sad really.
Also, this question reminds me of something which happened last year during durga puja. One misunderstanding which spiralled into something not too much fun for me, and hilarious for the spectators (and by spectators i mean my lovely friends, who dish out wonderful advice and then point at me and laugh. Love you guys!).

Won a contest?: Never dammit! Unless you count tambola........ :-(

Run a red light/stop sign?: Remember I can't drive? And my parents don't think it's a good idea to let me take the car for a spin till i learn. I don't see their point.

Been suspended from school?: Okay can we stop with the embarrassing questions already? No, duh. I was a stickler for rules in school.

Been in a car accident?: Nope.

Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night?: I would've died for Christ's sakes!! I know I have quite an appetite for a girl, but a pint???

Walked the streets drunk?: Nope. In fact the question should be rephrased as, "Ever got drunk?" Nope. I walk the wild side don't I?

Had déjà vu?: Oh yeah, a lot. One of the reasons, other than the whole spacing out thing, why I think I'm mildly schizophrenic.......

Danced in the moonlight?: romantic-dancing-with-your-boyfriend in the moonlight? No. Idiotic-dancing-with-friends-on-the-terrace in the moonlight? Yes, multiple times.

Witnessed a crime?: Nope.

Been obsessed with post-it notes?: For a while, especially those lovely pink ones. I had also developed this insane fascination for erasers at one point of time. Colourful ones, plain ones, weird shaped ones, scented ones......okay I should probably stop.

Squished barefoot through the mud?: Yup. It's an interesting sensation. More pleasant than unpleasant, if you get what i mean.

Been lost?: Well according to my parents, i got lost in appu ghar once and created a right ruckus. I don't remember that though. Can't think of anything else.

Been on the opposite side of the country?: Only as far as Chennai. Or Hyderabad. I'm not too sure which is further away.

Swum in the ocean?: Yes, but only a few times; in Goa and in Australia. It was brilliant. :-( If only Delhi was near the ocean or something.....

Cried yourself to sleep?: Yes.

Played cops and robbers?: Yup, hasn't everyone?

Recently coloured with crayons?: Nope. The creative streak in me sort of faded away as i grew up. Quite sad, come to think of it.

Sung karaoke?: Only when nobody's around. I have this thing about singing in front of people. I just can't do it!

Paid for a meal with only coins?: Nope, but i love the idea!!! I'm gonna do it for sure one of these days. The only thing i've done which is remotely like this is when i once paid a rickshawalla ten bucks in 50 paise coins. He was not happy.

Done something you told yourself you wouldn't?: Only about a million times! My will power is not exactly very effective, if not non-existent.

Made prank phone calls?: Of course. Though i haven't ever made any really cool ones. They've been kinda lame, most of them. Alas, wasted opportunities.

Caught a snow flake on your tongue?: Never been anywhere near snow. :-(

Written a letter to Santa Claus?: Once. And in my defence, i was 12 or something for crying out loud.

Blown bubbles?: You know, it's so funny but i've never done that! Mum would never let me buy the ones they sold in India Gate and all, coz she thought I'd catch some horrible fatal disease or something. Sad....

Bonfire on the beach?: Nope. Sure as hell wanna do it though. Maybe this year, on the college trip. :-)

Cheated on a test?: Yeah. Very few times though, not because i'm very morally upright or anything, but because i was simply extremely scared of getting caught.

Gone skinny-dipping in a pool?: Nope. If i'd ever tried that in our school swimming pool, i would've been expelled. And if i try it in the Siri Fort swimming pool (which is where i've been swimming for the past few years), I'll give a large number of people near-heart attacks.

Phew, that was terribly terribly long. And the only purpose it served was to remind me of the fact that i've lived an extremely sedate life till now.

You know what, i'm going to do this tag again a year later; and i hope to god it's more interesting then.

Anyway, I'm not going to tag any people in particular. It's a really fun tag honestly, so i tag everyone who reads this entry. Do give it a shot. Of course, it's completely upto you whether you want to do it or not, but it's quite interesting really.

For the record, this was the last post before my exams, which incidentally begin on the 12th, and end on the 30th. I'll be back after the 30th of April.

Until then, goodbye, and happy doing-the-tag!

P.S. - I hate to admit it, but someone pulled a brilliant gag on me on April fool's. And I, gullible little thing that I am, fell for it hook, line and sinker. I am not happy with myself. Nevertheless, the tables will be turned next year. And i will have the last laugh. Hah!

Rose Tinted Glasses

2007-03-25T15:55:00.001+05:30

Today is my uncle's engagement. Small family affair (thank god; I'm not a big fan of huge gatherings where relatives you've never met before ask you amazingly personal questions with straight faces) at his fiancee's place.

The way they met is pretty cool. And a tad filmy. My uncle has been learning salsa for about 3 years now. His fiancee joined the same place some months back, and as they say, the rest was history.(For the record, I learnt salsa at the same place for a couple of months, and I didn't get to meet any cute guys, except for one of the instructors who was already engaged to another instructor. And I think they're married now. And all this is irrelevant so I'm going to stop.)

Aah, i can totally see it. They dance with each other, and fall in love in the process.....

Which reminds me, do check out the video I'm putting up. It's a song called Suzanne by Leonard Cohen, and it's a beautiful song. Very mushy, but beautiful nonetheless. And wonderfully romantic. Evidently, I'm in a very violins-in-the-background-blue-skies-birds-chirping kind of a mood right now.

And this isn't exactly the best time for that, seeing how the godforsaken exams are practically here. And also for various other reasons.

Had a funny dream last night. Which has made me realize something, and that something has messed me up in my head. First time a dream has worried me. I need help.

I'm Too Sleepy To Think Of a CLever Title

2007-03-22T16:37:00.000+05:30

Well firstly, the series of 'creepy guy' stories was quite unintentionally done. Lol. And also, those aren't the only kind of guys I bump into(thank goodness) but it's more fun writing about them! They sure as hell make for interesting reading. The "Crossroads" incident happened in December. Had wanted to write about it for quite a while. But it was sooo frikkin' long that I kept putting it off.

Of course, technically speaking I shouldn't have all the time in the world right now, what with the f*&%$#@ exams breathing down my neck. But somehow, this is when the urge to blog has hit me hard. I mean, c'mon, this is the 8th entry of the month, and there's still about a week left!! When have I ever done more than 5(5 is probably the maximum, I average around 4 i think) in a month, epitome of laziness that I am. Need some serious re-prioritisation(yeah I know, I made it up okay? leave me alone!).

Oh before I forget, take a look at the sequel to the previous entry here.

Have the awful feeling that I might not exactly ace the exams. But unfortunately that awful feeling is not strong enough to make me want to study. Damn!

Can't study this weekend coz it's my uncle's engagement on Sunday and a pre-engagement lunch(whatever that means) on Saturday. And I'm not exactly complaining. :-D

Anyway, right now I'm sleepy and hungry and need to pretend to study(solely for my own satisfaction; as long as I have the readings in my hand, I can daydream as much as I want and not feel guilty) so I'm off.

Until next time(and the wait won't be too long, seeing how I've developed this almost obsessive love for blogging), goodbye.

Collected Short Stories by MeMyself_n_I : Part V

2007-03-22T00:45:00.000+05:30

Read this only if you have a lot of time on your hands, coz it's quite a longish post(actually longish is an understatement, it's mindnumbingly lengthy).

Story 6 : The one where the ironies of life are revealed.

Chapter I

It’s the 3rd day of “Crossroads’, my college fest. The ‘War of the DJs’ has ended prematurely, thanks to a bunch of DUSU hooligans, and also some guys from the Hindu union (take a look here if you don’t know what I’m talking about). It’s only nine-thirty, and the fest is over for the night. Arpita has quite enjoyed herself, as have I. But the excitement has proved to be a bit too much for some of the girls, who are at their screechy best.

The boys tell us that it’s best to leave, as there might be more trouble. So a few of us head to Nirula’s, as the action has left us quite hungry. The roads are surprisingly empty, so a couple of girls amongst us aren’t feeling too happy, especially since we had decided to walk. Arpita, Anisha and I are feeling quite chirpy, and the jeep full of drunk guys only adds to our joie de vivre.

We reach Nirula’s and Arpita and I decide to share a hot chocolate fudge. After we’ve placed our orders, we realize that it’s almost ten. And that is when it strikes me that the last metro leaves at 10:12 pm. We say our goodbyes hurriedly, snatch the hot chocolate fudge from the counter-guy and start running. Somehow, there are no rickshaws around that night. Arpita is mumbling curses under her breath, and I am yelling out profanities to the world at large. We reach the metro station, out of breath and majorly pissed. The fact that I am forced to throw away the hot chocolate fudge (this incident has been mentioned here also) does nothing to elevate my mood.

I have a metro smartcard, but Arpita doesn’t. The length of the line at the ticket counter is highly worrying. While Arpita is standing in line, I look around for some person who’s already in the line, and looks nice enough to buy a ticket for her. Spot this quiet looking guy, and go ask him if he would mind buying a ticket to Central Secretariat for us. He agrees.

Here begins the confusion. None of us have any change. All three of us, this guy, Arpita and me, have only hundred rupee notes. It would be real silly to offer 2 hundred rupee notes for two tickets worth Rs 20 in grand total. So this guy buys Arpita’s ticket also.

Arpita does not feel too happy about this, and starts rummaging around in her bag for change. She manages to find 2 five rupee coins and proceeds to hand them over to the guy. This guy vociferously refuses to accept the money. Seeing how there’s nothing to be done, we start walking (well running actually, since we had about 30 seconds left to catch the metro).

This guy suddenly decides to strike up a conversation with us (read Arpita; he was quite charmed by her), which does not please us too much. But since he did buy Arpita’s ticket, we have to be civil to him. He happens to mention that his office is in Kamla Nagar and we should drop in sometime……..

We reach home at eleven thirty after a lovely day, tired, at peace with the world.

Chapter II

It’s the end of the 4th and last day of ‘Crossroads’. Arpita, Anuja and I are walking towards the metro station, well in time since Arpita’s mum has given her specific instructions to be at Central Secretariat by ten. We are telling Anuja about the previous night’s incident, and how it’ll be so extremely funny if we run into the same guy today.

You know what they say about tempting fate right? Yup, we run into the same guy. Arpita and I smile weakly at him, and then Arpita and Anuja go to buy their tickets. While I’m waiting for them, this guy, for some, reason, decides to give me company.

Suddenly, he tells me that his office has shifted. I nod, while silently wondering what in heaven’s name is Arpita doing for so bloody long. Then he says, “Why don’t you take my phone number, in case you need to contact me sometime?”

I’m a little slow on the uptake, so I can’t really figure out why I would need to ‘contact him’, so to speak. But since he’s looking at me expectantly, I take out my phone and save his number. He still hangs around for a while, which is when it strikes me that he probably expects me to give him my number too, seeing how things like these are mutual.

Now obviously, I DON’T want to give him my number, and a heave a sigh of relief when Arpita comes back. The guy probably wants to try his luck with her now, but decides to back off when he sees the look on Anuja’s face.

Arpita and Anuja practically roll around on the floor of the metro with laughter when I tell them what just transpired.

If you’re still awake, you’re probably wondering what the point of such an amazingly lengthy story was. I mean, c’mon there’s got to be a point!

Well the point is, the last metro does not leave at 10:12 pm. It actually leaves at 10:50 pm.

‘Ironical’, do I hear you say?

When Life Pulls A Fast One On You

2007-03-19T19:55:00.000+05:30

Wonder how exactly my life is so amazingly eventful. For instance, let's take today.

Bare facts first. Today was our college annual day. The president, Mr. A.P.J. Abdul Kalam was supposed to come. I was real excited about seeing him.

Now the plan was, I’ll meet Nishita in CP, we'll have lunch, and then we'll head to college. But seeing how it's me, plans never ever work out.

I asked Nishita to meet me in front of Wengers. She was a little late, so I was standing there, probably looking highly bored. After some time, this other guy came and stood next to me, presumably to meet somebody. How wrong I was!!!

After a while, he asked me, "Are you waiting for someone?" When I replied in the affirmative, he seemed to gain confidence, and started asking me all about myself. He was very happy to learn that I’m from DU, and when I said I’m from SRCC, he informed me that he studied in KMC, and seemed to think that it was a great coincidence that I’m from SRCC while he was from KMC(don't ask me why....).

Then he proceeded to tell me what he'd done his post graduation in and how he was running his own business.... I nodded perfunctionarily, all the while frantically messaging Nishita to “hurry up coz this awfully creepy guy is chatting me up".

Seeing how this was not really grabbing my attention, he decided to throw caution to the wind and said, "I don't think you're friend is going to turn up, why don't you come with me to janpath and we'll grab something to eat?"

And that is when I freaked out. I mean, really and totally freaked out. Nothing like that had ever happened to me before so I had absolutely no idea as to how you're supposed to handle this kind of a situation. Still, I clearly told him that the prospect of lunching with him did not appeal to me one bit (well not in those words really, but words to that effect). That did not deter him at all (I’m assuming he's a pro at this, as he refused to take no for an answer).

I kept declining his attractive(not!!!) offer, even though he pointed out that I had nothing to worry about as he would be there....what he said was, and I quote here, "Aap itna darr kyon rahi hain? Main hoon naa!" and I came back with a very cutting, but completely ineffective, "Agar aapko jaana hai toh aap jaa sakte hain, main aapke saath nahi jaaoongi".

I was getting very very very worried and was mentally preparing myself to scream out loud when the guy decided to back off with a "are you sure aapko nahi jana?" I was so fucking relieved I almost laughed out loud in sheer happiness.

And that is when dear old Nishita makes her entrance.

Now I’m not one of those man-hating, slogan-shouting feminists. But it's men like these who make me think twice before taking a guy at face value. And it’s men like these who give the male species a bad name.

But that's not where the story ends.

After lunch (which was had at yummy KFC), we head for college. We have to walk from the metro station, as there are barricades all over the place. We see the convoy pass right in front of our eyes, complete with the bulletproofed windshields and the president's stretch limo and a huge number of cars all around it.

After they've entered SRCC, they let us through the barricades and we walk to college. Where we find out that the whole college has been sealed and nobody can enter and nobody can leave until the president leaves!

Talk about disappointment. And awful bad luck.

By the way, notice anything Aditya?

Mindfucked

2007-03-18T00:53:00.000+05:30

I'm annoyed. And Confused. And majorly pissed with some people.

And not so majorly pissed with some, but still majorly confused about them.

I am definitely highly pissed with myself for being so confused.

I have no idea what to do.

Help!

Thank You Mr. Watterson

2007-03-13T19:46:00.000+05:30

Hahahaha. Me too.

Couldn't resist putting this one up. Made my day. :-D

Brain Damage

2007-03-10T18:17:00.001+05:30

The lunatic is on the grass
The lunatic is on the grass
Remembering games and daisy chains and laughs
Got to keep the loonies on the path

The lunatic is in the hall
The lunatics are in my hall
The paper holds their folded faces to the floor
And every day the paper boy brings more

And if the dam breaks open many years too soon
And if there is no room upon the hill
And if your head explodes with dark forbodings too
Ill see you on the dark side of the moon

The lunatic is in my head
The lunatic is in my head
You raise the blade, you make the change
You re-arrange me till Im sane
You lock the door
And throw away the key
Theres someone in my head but its not me.

And if the cloud bursts, thunder in your ear
You shout and no one seems to hear
And if the band youre in starts playing different tunes
Ill see you on the dark side of the moon

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Was watching season 4 of F.R.I.E.N.D.S last night. realised that F.R.I.E.N.D.S only manages to depress me now. damn.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

(the video which you're seeing isn't the original video of 'Brain Damage'. couldn't find the complete version of the original one anywhere. song's 'Brain Damage' by Pink Floyd, one of my all-time favorites, not least because it messes with my head majorly. :-p. read the lyrics if you don't know what i'm talking about.)

Pun Fully Intended

2007-03-07T20:51:00.000+05:30

this is probably the most nonsensical post i've ever written, but i had so much fun doing this one. presenting to you, a list of extremely lame puns revolving around the name TANIA, which, for the record, is my name.

the credit for this entry goes to pragati, who came up with the first eight for reasons yet unfathomable to me, which gave me the brilliant idea of putting up a whole bunch of them on my blog.

the remaining have been thought up by anisha, arpita and yours truly.
( for the record, 'you' in the jokes refers to me; pragati obviously used you, since she was talking to me, and i decided to do the same)

1) what would you be called if you had a thing for feet? toe-nia

2) what would you be called if you liked music? tune-nia

3) what would you be called if you had a thing for the sun? tanned-ia

4) what would you be called if all your clothes were torn? torn-ia

5) what would you be called if you liked everything new? ta-nayaa

6) what wud you be called if you rejected everything? ta-naah-ya

7) what would you be called if you were grounded? banned-ia

8) what would you be called if you always scored perfectly? ten-ia

9) what would you be called if you liked seafood? tuna-ia

10) what would you be called if you were crazy? mania

11) what would you be called if you were really small? tiny-a

12) what would you be called if you were hanging upside down from the ceiling? fan-ia

13) what would you be called if you took part in races? ran-ia

14) what would you be called if you always carried a mirror around with you? vain-ia

15) what would you be called if you were really smart? brain-ia

we could've(and did) come up with a lot more(we really got into the groove of the whole thing), but they kept on getting lamer and lamer and LAMER, so i decided to put up only 15 of them here. please don't laugh at me(please DO laugh at the jokes though...lol).

the next bit is going to be not-so-cheerful and is going to involve a lot of introspection, so you might want to give it a miss.

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on the surface, everything's back to normal. i'm going to college, lazing around on the lawns, meeting up with friends, going out for lunch, watching movies, cribbing about having to study, studying a little bit, completing assignments, blogging, talking on the phone, fighting with mum, making up with her, playing with the babies(i cannot possibly explain to you how beautiful they are), having some ve-ry interesting conversations with my kid brother(he's become very insightful all of a sudden), solving(or trying to solve) the crossword with dad, checking out cute guys, drooling at hot ones, worrying about my hair, window shopping.....u get my drift.

anyway, the point is, i'm back to doing everything i used to, but things don't feel the same. i still enjoy all of it, but somehow something's missing this time round. everything's fine as long as i'm doing something, but when i'm not, things seem messed up.

i think i'm messed up in my head, and i don't know what to do about it. as far as i can tell, there isn't any reason why i should be feeling this way. but the point is, i am. and there isn't anything i can do about it.

Of Purple Nails And Dirty Details

2007-03-05T16:41:00.000+05:30

had a brilliant weekend, especially if i compare it to the last couple of weekends(which were traumatic, to say the least. lol). but leaving that aside, by any standards, this weekend was excellent.

was ria's birthday on friday. she took us to appu ghar!! :-D
hadn't been to that place in years. had a crazy time, looaads of fun. which reminds me, still have to buy her gift! damn.

also, met a couple of friends i hadn't met in ages. which was really nice, lots of plans to meet up in the coming weekend have been made. let's hope they work out.

but the best EVER was sunday. holi was absolutely A.M.A.Z.I.N.G.
i've never had so much fun on any holi. it wasn't really wild, if you ignore the muddy(and quite possibly full of not-very-nice things...we saw a lot of funny looking bits floating around in it) water that we threw on a couple of people and the highly suggestive hindi songs that we sang awfully loudly.

no eggs(unless you count the 2 that landed on siddharth and me respectively from a passing car), no grease, no rotten veggies and absolutely no throwing of water balloons at strangers(though this may have been more because of the fact that we threw them at each other and finished them, than out of any consideration for the people on the roads). what we actually did was pretend to throw balloons at people, which yielded some extremely hilarious results. yes, juvenile, i agree, but it was So.Much.Fun.

my still-purple nails are testimony to the amount of fun we had. it was sheer torture trying to get the colour off me, but heck, completely worthwhile.

think i might have a bit of fever. haven't told mum yet because i'm not exactly in the right frame of mind to listen to a lot of i-told-you-so's and no-paani-wala-holi-for-you-next-year and switch-off-the-computer-and-go-to-bed-this-instant.

by the way, honeymoon travels private ltd is NOT an awful movie. it's pretty darn good. and music and lyrics is a tad predictable, but hugh grant is terribly hot.

realize i need to lose some weight desperately. have been eating a little too much these past couple of weeks. things came to a head yesterday, when i ate like there's no tomorrow. holi sweets are too yummy to pass by. but from today, no rich food, no sweets, only ghar ka ghana.

anyway, i'm off, not feeling too good. will go take a little nap, hope i feel better after that. until next time, goodbye.

P.S. - will be putting up the holi pictures shortly!! we look like a bunch of complete hooligans; kids ran away from us. :-p

Yes They ARE Extremely Valid Reasons, and other things.

2007-02-27T18:56:00.000+05:30

I'm kinda pissed at myself for deleting that post of mine. wish i hadn't. so before anything else, if anyone knows how to retrieve deleted posts. do let me know.

anyway, let me explain the reasons behind changing the address of my blog. firstly, i was highly bored of the old one. it was staid, unimaginative and honestly speaking, quite juvenile.

secondly, i have a bit of a sadistic streak in me. quite evidently, the new link isn't exactly easy to spell. and neither does it roll off your tongue. honestly, it wasn't really a cakewalk locating my blog was it? yes, i know i'm weird, but this is how i get my kicks. humour me please.

thirdly, i really like the new name! i think it's waaaay cool.

and fourthly, i'm mildly schizophrenic......heh heh heh. no actually, as far as i know, i'm not really schizophrenic, but it's fun to pretend that i am. and the fact that i tend to space out at times(and i mean really space out....i'm pretty much oblivious to everything around me...i've learnt to do it at will now, but earlier it was involuntary, which was quite creepy, to say the least) does help.

also, it's a brilliant way to catch someone's attention and keep holding it for quite a while. try it sometime. next time you meet somebody new, after a few minutes, tell them, "hey you want to hear something interesting? i'm mildly schizophrenic[or manic-depressive or obsessive-compulsive or neurotic or suffer from split-personality disorder(this is my favorite one but the thought of actually saying it kinda worries me) or whatever catches your fancy]." you'll get to see some ve-ry interesting expressions.

for the record, yes i do tell people that i'm mildly schizophrenic. but only when i'm bored out of my mind or when i want to catch their attention.

damn, the stories are piling up. need to put them up. but they require more effort than random entries. intrinsic laziness and a wonderful knack for procrastinating keeps me from writing those. get the awful feeling that they might not be posted till may, since i have exams in april. will try my hardest to put up at least one in march......

looking forward to this weekend big time. sunday is holi! couldn't play holi last year coz of the f*&%$#@ boards. so this year i am very very excited. was feeling a bit under the weather last night; same old reason. guess it's going to take a while for me to be completely fine. my annoying memory keeps me from getting over the whole thing. every single thing reminds me of something or the other. wish i could stop myself from thinking. anyway, didn't mean to digress. my point is, i'm looking forward to holi for this reason also. it's bound to get my mind off things. and the bhaang will go a long way in doing just that....hehehe.

anyway, i'm off, need to do some studying. which reminds me, i seem to have lost the ability to study! i just cannot seem to concentrate anymore. i'm going to get very badly screwed if this state of affairs continues.

i really need to do something about my amazing bullshitting capabilities. alright, i'm going to stop. until next time, goodbye.

Hello There!

2007-02-21T21:05:00.000+05:30

pretty short hiatus, don't u think? i'm glad though, glad that i bounced back pretty quick. i'm not absolutely fine really, but hey, i'm doing pretty well i think, considering that it's been only a few days. this is going to be extremely short, because the entire purpose of this is basically to let people know that i'm okay. hehe.

the last entry was terribly terribly melodramatic i realized, when i read it again. and i made out things to be worse than they actually are. things seemed awfully bad then, but in hindsight they weren't really that bad. the fact that things were so unexpected was probably what made it so hard to deal with. anyway, basically, the fact of the matter is that i'm okay.

also, another thing is that when people are not feeling too happy, they tend to blow things out of proportion, which somehow makes them feel better. actually i don't really know about people but that's what i do. lol. and that is exactly what i did. exaggeration is seriously therapeutic, honest!

slight bit of introspection. till now, i always thought that ambiguity is something which is reason enough to not rush into things. and that unless you are absolutely clear about your state of affairs, it isn't exactly a good idea to take decisions, especially reasonably important ones. was i being too idealistic? maybe things don't work like that in real life. maybe things are never completey clear cut, there's always some amount of ambiguity. i don't know.......

anyway, this was supposed to be short; didn't work out too well now did it? the indefatigable gift of gab i guess. lol anyway, i'm done for now, will stop chattering. until next time, goodbye!

Of Life, In No Uncertain Terms

2007-02-19T11:18:00.000+05:30

first of all, yes i did delete the last post and no, you are not suffering from delusions. i am not upto explaining, especially on a public forum, but let's just say that sometimes in life, things don't work our the way you want them to. or even the way you expect them to.

i'm having a pretty hard time right now, and well, i need to deal with it. i'll be fine in a few days i guess(and hope). the only thing that is bothering me is this. call it naivete, but i'm a person who tends to take things at face value. and this is going to sound extremely funny, but i have(or used to have) faith in the essential goodness of people. and i thought that anything else was an exception rather than the norm. guess i was quite wrong. coming to what's bothering me, i've just lost that faith. i've become so extremey skeptical of people.

i've always been a very cynical person; but my cynicism had more to do with circumstances. i always thought that circumstances make people do what they do, but at the end of the day, most people are intrinsically good. or at least, people my age.

also, i thought that most of the times, what you see is what you get. i just can't believe that anymore. in fact(and i feel terrible about this) when people are being nice to me, i keep thinking about how they probably have ulterior motives. and that makes me feel so sick. but i don't know how else to think.

this is because i can't deal with this kind of a situation again. it was awful, and totally unexpected. and i don't think i deserve it. so, i don't know, as a defence mechanism i guess, i've just got to be highly skeptical of people.

i'm not playing the blame game and blaming anybody, because people have extremely valid reasons for doing what they do, and what happened was for the best. i'm really glad things turned out the way they did, and relieved that things ended where they did. i'm honestly glad about what happened. but i can't help thinking, if only i hadn't taken things at face value, none of this would've ever happened. and that thought kills me. and i'm helpless.

anyway, i've tried explaining as best as i could. don't know if that made much sense, or whether it made too much sense and everything is very obvious. and honestly speaking, at this point of time, i'm too tired to care very much. i probably sound terribly melodramatic, and you're probably thinking how i'm making such a big deal of nothing, and that stuff like this happens to everybody. yes i agree, but this was a first for me, and i needed to rant a little bit. also, the whole thing has left me terribly disillusioned, so it'll take time for me to come to terms with that.

i won't be blogging for a while, because i'm just not upto it. might be a few weeks before my next post. try not to miss me too much. lol. only a short hiatus, i promise.

Collected Short Stories by MeMyself_n_I : Part IV

2007-01-30T00:06:00.000+05:30

finally, after umpteen false starts and innumerable mood swings, "Collected Short Stories..." returns, and will hopefully stick around for a while.

the story that shall be told today is one with which most girls(and quite a few guys...*evil grin*) can identify with. also it happened such a long time back, i'm surprised it hadn't featured in my blog till now. anyway, without further ado, let the storytelling begin.

Story 5 : The one with the offer of friendship

the story begins one lovely september evening in delhi. a slight breeze is blowing, the weather is pleasantly warm, just enough to keep you from feeling cold, but not oppressive. basically, its a beautiful autumn evening, golden leaves on the ground and everything. i am walking around with a friend, feeling quite happy and at peace with the world.

but of course, life isn't fair is it? just when u least expect it, fate throws something nasty at u.

a shady looking guy decides to approach us. we aren't too happy, for obvious reasons. i'm putting down the exact conversation, as well as i can remember it.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

the characters in the following *ahem* drama, if i may call it, are

Me - pretty obvious who i'm talking about
A - the friend
CG - creepy guy

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CG(addressing me) - excuse me, can i have your number please?

Me(in shock) - uhh....umm...i don't think so.

CG(he seems to have not heard me) - excuse me, i asked u a question. can i have your number please?

Me(a little more firmly, though still highly worried) - i'm sorry, but i can't give u my phone number.

CG(pretending to not have heard me) - excuse me miss, can i have your number please?

A(deciding to take over, as i'm not being too assertive in my refusal) - didn't u hear her? she said no! also, she doesn't even know u! how can she just give her number to any random guy???

CG - oh i'm sorry. hi, my name is anmol. can i have your number please?

Me(barely able to supress my giggles, but still not feeling very happy about the whole situation) - uhh....umm....welll....*very softly* i have enough friends.

CG - only for decent friendship.

And that is when A and i realize that things are getting way out of hand and decide to beat a hasty retreat. we run as far away as possible, as fast as our legs can take us.

The End.

The wait is over, you can stop holding your breath now.

2007-01-20T20:21:00.000+05:30

ahhhhhhhhhhhh finally!!! my computer has come back to life. u cannot possibly have any idea about how happy i am right now. i have been wasting away without the net. i needed to do some serious blogging(read serious ranting), which was obviously not possible without the computer. so i was losing my mind, honestly(okay maybe i'm exaggerating a little bit...).

anyway, if u guys remember, last time round, i had written a not-so-cheerful entry, to say the least. well heh heh heh, my new year's eve actually turned out to be very nice. and studying went for a toss(which naturally resulted in my exams going not-so-well but what the heck, u can't have everything in life).

hols were lovely, and my previous post was just a momentary lapse in good old common sense. and well, i tend to exaggerate a teeny-tiny bit, in case u haven't noticed already. basically, the fact of the matter is, i am back to being my cheerful and highly witty, not to mention very very modest self.

a little digression here. ppl just assumed that my last blog was about 'me looking for loooove' and all that crap. well it wasn't . and that is that.

also, i supremely dislike all the people i have tagged. they just could not do one little tag. i am veeery annoyed.

my blogging skills(so to speak) are a tad rusty, courtesy my exams and my temporarily defunct computer(not my procrastination skills or sheer laziness, for once). so if u want to bang ur head against ur screen while you're reading my blog, u have complete liberty to do so. for one, you are possibly used to much higher standards of literature(i'm flattering myself here). for two, it's ur frikking monitor and ur frikking self. u can go kill yourself for all i care.
okay, well that's a very mean thing to say, i was only joking. i love u guys! where would i be without my lovely readers??

lately i have been pretty sprightly, notwithstanding the (extremely annoying)exams. touchwood though, hope it lasts. anyway, i don't exactly know why i've been all chirpy. maybe because i've finally let go of some baggage i had been carrying around for a while. also because someone told me about this highly interesting concept, which is all about looking at the larger picture in life. i have modified this theory somewhat.
my theory is about looking at the largest picture ever in life. to quote somebody, man(and woman) was meant to be happy , and not worry about either exams or about the big picture.

which reminds me, me and a friend will be writing a book very soon. it'll be our take on philosophy, and also our special theory of relativity. bet it'll be unlike anything you've ever read before. heh heh heh.

anyway, this also means that "Collected Short Stories.." will be back anytime now. and that i will blog regularly now on. yes i will! i will, i swear!

anyway, am feeling very sleepy, and i HAVE to publish this blog today. so let me stop here and let u get back to doing whatever u were doing before stumbling onto my blog(or if you're a regular reader, voluntarily reading it, for which i really like u). until next time, goodbye dear reader. and this time, it won't be long until the next time we meet(it won't i swear!!).

'tis the season to be jolly

2006-12-28T10:04:00.000+05:30

no, it is not another one of my overtly cheerful "Short Stories.." because, somehow, i am just not upto writing wonderfully chirpy tales about myself at the moment.

remember all that stuff i wrote about how i prefer to keep stuff below the surface and all? (this is assuming that you read my blog on a somewhat regular basis. if u don't, well then i can't help it can i?) well i had almost changed my mind about that but, surprise, turns out that i was right!

it is sooo much better to not have things spelled out concretely. you at least have less stuff to piss u off later on. stuff which should never have bothered u in the first place. but nooo, all your cards SHOULD be on the goddamn table.

well u guys should know that if things had been left to themselves, you would be reading yet another funny story instead of my crap.

and yeah, since everybody seemed to be highly intrigued about all the love that was budding in my last entry, well let me inform everyone that it has absolutely NOTHING to do with me. was referring to my friends, all of whom seem to have wonderfully happy love lives. and if not wonderfully happy, they at least have love lives. i do not even have a semblance of a love life. it is Non-Existent. so there.

anyway, have a Very Happy New Year everyone. mine will simply be great. and the fact that i have exams from the 8th of jan only adds to my already overflowing happiness.

the fest and more

2006-12-10T22:10:00.000+05:30

i know i know i have been seriously neglecting my poor blog. but i had some extremely valid reasons for doing so. the week before last i had 3 tests back to back. and since i had to start studying from scratch, i could hardly have blogged. and last week, i had my fest(which was brilliant, for the record. u shall soon see how)so again.....

fest got over yesterday. so my holidays have officially begun from today. u know what's funny? when we had our autumn break, i was so extremely glad. not that i hated college or anything, but, well, given a choice i would have chosen to not go to college. this time, i'm gonna miss college. which surprises me, because for some reason i had assumed that i would never really LIKE like college u know. but for the past few months i've actually started to really enjoy college. which makes me quite happy, because spending three years in a place you're just okay with isn't too good.

okay enough introspection. i didn't want this one to be a serious entry. oh right, about the fest. well first the bare facts. srcc's fest, 'crossroads', was from the 20th to the 23rd of december. 20th was kinda random, 21st was pop night, 22nd was 'war of the Djs' night and 23rd was rock night.

i am terrible terribly ashamed to say that....mika(sob) came for the pop night. pragati sums up my emotions best with this hypothetical conversation she made up.

tania: oh hey want a pass for my fest? SRCC!

XYZ: ofcourse! thanks! who's performin anyway?

tania: errrmm...uhhh...now doesnt matter really does it? the purpose is to meet up and have fun right?

XYZ: umm...yea, but still, whos comin?

tania: *thinks of another clever line to move away from the bloody ques but fails*....mika....*whisper*

XYZ: WHAT!!!!!! oh i mean, great *choke*. actually, im outta town...

but okay, we didn't attend mika. went to hindu and attended euphoria's concert. i'm not a big fan of indipop(or any kind of pop for that matter) but heck, anything is better than MIKA. heard some really funny stuff happened. and awfully surprising. people actually(i swear to god) broke barricades and had semi-fights to watch the man in action. and(i swear i'm not kidding) a couple of guys climbed up on stage and kissed him! eeeyuckk. fine, you're very very drunk, you're high and quite possibly you're extremely desperate, but kissing mika??!!

slight digression. venky has a terrific crowd and all, but what the hell happened on the 20th??? am talking specifically about mr. and miss nexus.

right, coming back to my fest. 22nd night was brilliant. it was straight out of some typical hindi movie. let me paint a picture for u. nighttime. very crowded place. drunk guys. baseball bats. wooden sticks. bikes. jeeps. 10 guys in each jeep. people running helter-skelter(haha i love that phrase). girls screaming. blood. police. lathi charge.

can u possible get more filmy than that?

we had a brilliant time. though i felt kinda sorry for the poor DJs, who could spin their whatever-they-spin for about an hour only. also felt sorry for the girls from the other colleges, who had come dressed in their flashiest(and tiniest, in that kind of weather. christ). poor girls were traumatised. *hahahahaha*. we heard a lot of filmy conversations too. along the lines of "oh my god, yeh sab kya ho raha hai?"

the guys(of my college that is) deserve a special mention. they were damn sweet. all very protective and are-u-guys-okay and u-guys-should-leave-now and u-should-go-stand-over-there. thanks u guys, for the concern!

after it all got over, and we got tired of the screechy girls, we went to nirula's for hot chocolate fudge. by the time the guy got our sundae, it was ten. arpita and i had to catch the metro till central secretariat, from where my driver was supposed to pick us up. i realized that the last metro leaves at 10:12. next thing, me and arpita are running towards the metro station(for some weird reason there were no rickshaws that night, only drunk guys driving around). well we did manage to catch that metro(thanks to a guy, whose story will be told in the next blog) and then found out that the last metro leaves at eleven. oh well, a run always does u good.

the only part of the night which miffed me was that we had to throw away a lot of the sundae. i sort of tried to sneak the thing into the metro, but the highly idiotic guard saw me. moron.

anyway, because of all that, security was really really tight yesterday. which didn't do much good to prithvi's and taaq's self-esteem i'm sure. because it was so much emptier than the day before. and highly empty according to ANY standards. i felt awfuly bad for them, especially because they were playing nice stuff.

well with that i end the story of my fest. it had all the makings of a movie; drama, violence, emotion, budding love(am not gonna elucidate because of obvious reasons), comedy(there was a hilarous thing called 'stupid cupid: mystery date' happening), horror(the columbus which went vertical on the last day...damn..i had 7 near-heart attacks) and a whole lot of fun.

do watch out for my next blog, because 'Collected Short Stories..' is coming back!! until then, Merry Christmas!

25 things i want to do before i die

2006-12-02T17:48:00.000+05:30

i've been putting this off for a very very long time, but finally i decided to get down to it. aditya, finally i "do" the tag, or whatever u call it.

this is in random order, not in order of preference AT ALL. i'm putting them down in the order they're striking me.

1) backpack across europe.

2) visit the louvre.

3) go bungee-jumping.

4) visit australia. have been there once but i want to go again. totally loved the place.

5) visit kashmir.

6) go to pakistan; lahore in particular.

7) attend a concert in hyde park.

8) this is sort of a sub-part of 7 but not exactly. watch the rolling stones, roger waters(i would have said pink floyd but alas), u2, aerosmith, gnr and dire straits perform live.

9) meet nitin, lead singer of parikrama!

10) make a hell lot of money. seriously.

11) go to see the taj mahal at night(they don't allow that anymore, but hey the list is of things that i WANT, not things that i want AND things that are possible).

12) MEET SHAHRUKH KHAN.

13) holiday in goa with friends.

14) WRITE A BOOK.

15) do something completely spontaenous, on the spur of the moment. and wild.

16) shop like there's no tomorrow, and no credit limit. :-p

17) go to outer space(refer to 11 for explaination).

18) take part in the delhi half-marathon(i plan to do that every year but something or the other comes up).

19) read catch-22. it is the only book which i haven't managed to complete after starting it.

20) do something brilliantly intelligent. something which will go down in history(here i go again....wishful thinking).

21) learn to fly a plane.

22) watch all the seasons of friends in one go(i might never recover from that but what the heck)

23) lose my cynicism.

24) die listening to floyd.

25) thank aditya for tagging me. and for making me dream......

okay, now i get to tag people!

i tag

siddharth
anupriya
arnab
kanika

note to arnab - u HAVE to do it! no two ways about it.

aditya deserves a special mention for telling me how to put up links. thanks!

Abstract

2006-11-20T23:04:00.000+05:30

am writing this post in a hurry because i don't have much time right now. but i really wanted to post this one today.

i am feeling completely confused. and not too happy. i like to keep things as uncomplicated as possible. but today some seemingly simple things managed to get terrifically complicated. and it does not please me.

also i like to keep some things unspoken. in the abstract. makes life a whole lot easier. but today a bunch of stuff was put on the table, stuff which i would have liked to not think about. or put into words.

and once things are said, they can't be unsaid again. they are out there. they can never be taken back and one can never pretend that they weren't said ever. once they have been brought into conscious thought, they can never be pushed back into the subconcious. and there are some things that i would have preferred to have left in the confines of my subconscious, at least for the time being. but i have been forced to prematurely recognise those things, and accept them as a part of my conscious, thinking mind.

now things have changed; maybe minutely, but the point is that they have. and i can never go back to being where i was before the whole thing happened. and that does not make me feel too good.

Collected Short Stories by MeMyself_n_I : Part III

2006-11-17T14:26:00.000+05:30

Story 4 : the one where i'm 'his love'

aah i love this one. as you shall soon see why.

i had gone to a parikrama gig at lsr a couple of weeks ago(for the record, i 've given up trying to do this chronologically). technically, it was a silk route plus parikrama gig, but silk route doesn't count(and they proved my point by boring people into their graves....except for a bunch of girls next to us who were getting veritably orgasmic...i swear). anyway, let's not digress.

parikrama's guitarist, saurabh chaudhry, is supposed to be quite the hottie, and a favorite with girls in the audience. and yeah, he is quite cute, and all the girls went completely crazy screaming for him when he came on stage. including *ahem* me. but then...i saw...a vision....in torn jeans and a PETA(why) t-shirt. he was hotness at its best. it was nitin, parikrama's lead singer.

i pointed him out to my friends, but they were too busy trying to attract saurabh's attention. then, nitin opened his mouth. and all the girls went, whoaaaaaa.
his voice is like a caress, honestly. i know you're laughing, but i swear!

then nitin started singing. with his voice and saurav's guitaring, the evening was getting very very heady. they did a few songs, amidst screeches of 'saurav saurav' and 'nitin nitin'. then there was a little pause between songs. i was screaming nitin's name along with everyone else but somehow, right then nobody else screamed. so suddenly, it's just my voice! a loud 'NITIIIIIN' rang out, in my voice.

i was about to do my imitation of "hey which idiot did that?" when i heard nitin's voice say, "yes love?". damn, i almost passed out from shock and ecstasy.

well even if it had been just that, i would still be floating around on air. but that night, god had more in store for me. hah!

welll my friends and i were in full form and we were really letting our vocal chords run amok while nitin did a couple more songs. then, before doing the next song, he pointed at us and said, "the next song goes out to those lovely ladies". and he sang 'sweet child o' mine' for us!

evidently, i had a brilliant evening and went home with a huge grin on my face. and narrated my exploits to everyone who was either patient enough or bored enough for the next one week.

footnote : i looked up nitin's email id on parikrama's website and sent him an email. and was very very pleasantly surprised to receive a reply. am contemplating sending another mail. and in case you're wondering, yes i AM slightly weird.

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i'm kinda tired of doing the stories, so i'm giving the whole thing a break for a bit. so it's back to my random scrawls for a while.
also, something i've been meaning to mention for a long time. i have deleted all of BK's messages. well, except for one, which i couldn't bring myself to delete, because it is so extremely sweet.(if u don't follow my blog this wouldn't have made much sense to you. go to 'message fetish' for enlightenment)

also, a BIG thanks to all the readers. i had a lovely time reading all the comments. Collected Short Stories will be back!

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NEW BULLETIN : was checking my mail right now and i have a mail from saurabh also!!! i had written in my mail to nitin that i really liked saurabh's satriani solo. and he has actually sent me a thank u mail!! damn thse guys are polite. i'm putting up the letters also now.

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this one's from nitin.

Hey Tania, dont know when you wrote this mail but i just got back in from out of town like right noe and i have at least a couple of hours before rushing off to the studio for a recording.. well thanx for such a sweet mail,,,,,,,,,,,and yes i remember someone screamin out my name to which i replied "yes love".............
You have a lot of nice things to say about us,, you're very kind and your compliments are really appreciated..
take care and may god bless us all
love
N.

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this one's from saurabh.

Hi Tania,

thanx a lot for complimenting 'summer song'. i wish we guys cud hav played the entire solo, but there a technical snag... :(
better luck next time...
regards,
Saurabh.

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Collected Short Stories by MeMyself_n_I : Part II

2006-11-08T17:53:00.000+05:30

Story 2 : the one with my 'twin soul'

this one is slightly weird, and u might not even find it funny, because it is somewhat of an inside joke between me and my friends. but here goes nothing. also it's not a story in the true sense of the word so....

one day, about a month after college had started, i got up on the bus and saw an exact replica of myself sitting on the seat in front of me. the same wavy, slightly messy hair, the same black t-shirt, same black belt, the same loose blue jeans and pretty much the same height. i was like, "jesus christ, she looks EXACTLY like me!!"

i was thinking to myself, "man how can somebody look so similar?". right then she turned around and i saw that it wasn't a 'she' at all; it was a guy!!!

the whole thing made me awfully sad, and i never got to hear the end of it from my friends. still constantly hear extremely lame jokes about my 'twin soul'.

for the record, now i know the guy personally, which makes the whole thing damn funny somehow.

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story 3: the one where i screw up!!

i had planned to not do this(interrupt my chronological collection of short stories, that is) but as if plans ever work out!

before going ahead i would like to formally anounce that i am a DUMBASS. okay, i can proceed now.

yesterday, while coming back from college, these 2 extremely cute guys got on my bus. i was surreptitiously checking then out, and thinking to myself, "why don't i ever get to meet guys like these?'. their brilliant english and their highly intellectual, and at the same time extremely witty conversation only served to add to their attractiveness-quotient. they were standing, and when the seat next to mine was vacated, one of them sat there.

that cheered me up enormously, and i couldn't pay too much of attention to the book i was reading(catcher in the rye, for the record). after a while i gave up trying to read and closed it(that shows my level of distraction, coz this book is one my favorites, and i can read it a million times).

okay, now comes the best bit.

Cute Guy - hey, i had made a bet with myself. are u doing history?
Me - no, i'm doing eco.
CG - oh ok.
Me - why did u think that? do u know somebody who looks like me who's doing history?
CG - no i thought english honours would be too obvious, that's why i said history. (!!! now that's a pickup line if i've ever heard one!!!)
Me - oh ok. well it's one of my favorite books.

and then i just stopped talking! i stopped talking!! a few minutes later my stop came and i climbed down and the guy went out of my life forever. :-(

stories are not really supposed to have an analysis in the end, but hey, this is my blog so i can do whatever i want! my point is, till now i had been cribbing about how circumstances are always against me and how things are "spiralling out of my control" and basically making a lot of melodramatic statements. and now, when circumstances were perfect, and things were completely in my control, i manage to completely screw things up. at the risk of sounding terribly terribly melodramatic(yet again), fate finally paves a way for me and i turn around and walk the other way!

footnote : this is highly embarrasing but i'll still say it(as a lesson to me and also for another reason, which u shall soon see). today i actually caught the same bus(the 4 o'clock one) in the hopes of meeting the guy again! talk about wishful thinking.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

okay this is a terribly lame thing to do but my friends have talked me into it.
if the aforementioned guy, by any chance, comes accross this blog, then, "hi, i'd like to tell u that i'm not an arrogant bitch. and that it would be nice if u were still interested in continuing that conversation....."

phew, that's done! never done a dumber thing than that.

(also now u know the 2nd reason behind the footnote)

Collected Short Stories By MeMyself_n_I : Part I

2006-11-06T16:24:00.000+05:30

ok the title is a somewhat of a misnomer. they aren't really 'story' stories. they're just incidents which struck me as extremely funny or are somehow significant to me(however insignificant they may seem to u). for want of a better way, i'll go chronologically.

Story 1 : the one with the same phones

alrite this one kinda makes me feel bad but nonetheless its quite funny, albeit in a slightly sadistic way. heh heh.

i had gone to my father's friend's place for dinner once. they're a lovely family. they have 2 kids, one daughter and one son(of my age incidentally). after dinner was over, the kids n the dads sat down to watch 'munnabhai lageraho' while the moms chatted. since i had already seen the movie(and did not like it enough to sit through it a second time) i decided to call a friend. now, as every teenager knows, calling from ur cellphone is not the smartest thing to do(given that prepaid connections have an awfully irritating feature called low balance). so i took my mom's phone and made the call from that(somehow she's cool about that...one of the few things that i do she's cool with...lol).

spoke to my friend for about 50 minutes, give or take a few, and then, feeling chirpier, went inside to sit with everyone(and maybe flirt with the guy a little...lol). when we were leaving, i handed my mom's phone to her. she was like, "that's not my phone. i have it with me". i was like, "holy shit!! who's phone did i just use???"

then the son comes, and says, "i think that's my phone" and i'm thinking, "oh noooo.....". aloud i said, "uhh i think i made a call from your phone." and he very sweetly said, "that's okay", not knowing that i had spent the better part of an hour frittering away his balance(i think his was postpaid though, which somehow makes the whole thing worse).

i went home feeling like a mean bitch. and was made to feel worse by a friend who said i should have told him about it, and offered to treat him or something in return. he must have got a HUGE shock at the end of the month when the bills came. shit!

P.S.- stay tuned for Collected Short Stories By MeMyself_n_I : Part II

A Rush Of Blood To The Head

2006-10-31T22:31:00.000+05:30

feeling majorly fucked up. god help me.

uncanny

2006-10-30T15:58:00.000+05:30

took this personality test on the net a couple of days ago. thought it would be like the usual test with some general result which can apply to almost anybody. was pleasantly surprised.

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion:

You have low extroversion.
You are quiet and reserved in most social situations.
A low key, laid back lifestyle is important to you.
You tend to bond slowly, over time, with one or two people.

Conscientiousness:

You have low conscientiousness.
Impulsive and off the wall, you don't take life too seriously.
Unfortunately, you sometimes end up regretting your snap decisions.
Overall, you tend to lack focus, and it's difficult for you to get important things done.

Agreeableness:

You have high agreeableness.
You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly.
Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone.
You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance.

Neuroticism:

You have medium neuroticism.
You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic.
Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy.
Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of.

Openness to experience:

Your openness to new experiences is high.
In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas.
You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits.
A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.

The Five Factor Personality Test

they managed to get quite of bit of things right.

other than my 'agreeableness' that is. they screwed that up completely. the bit about being willing to compromise with anybody; that's the complete opposite of what i am. compromising is not a word which can be associated with me.

they got my 'conscientiousness' and 'neuroticism' quite quite accurate. i was pretty majorly impressed. the 'openness to experience' was a bit overdone though i thought. i'm not THAT open to experiences, but yeah, they managed to get the gist right. the "extroversion' again was a little extreme. but again, the basic idea was correct.

so on the whole, a pretty smart test. i would recommend it, for the sole reason that it may turn out to be uncannily accurate.

message fetish??

2006-10-23T15:49:00.000+05:30

i have this strange thing about deleting SMSs. i just can't seem to delete them! and i don't mean forwards. i can't bring myself to delete conversations. at present my inbox has precisely 7 forwards. the rest of my 110 message capacity is taken up by conversations. and that too, mostly conversations with 2 people in particular.

let us call one of the persons HS. i don't keep HS's messages for sentimental reasons. the thing is, HS has a really funny way of messaging. i mean, they're SERIOUSLY funny. and arpita does a really cool job of reading them out. lol. and well, i keep HS's SMSs because they cheer me up. keep messaging HS!!!!

let's call the other person BK. somehow, i can't exactly explain why i have kept BK's messages. i mean, presently i'm not too fond of the person. well ok, at one point of time i was inordinately fond of BK. lol. but no, that isn't exactly why i keep the messages. i haven't kept the later messages, the ones sent after and immediately before what i shall refer to as 'the incident'. 'the incident' was, i think, a turning point in our acquaintance. can't call it friendship or something like that coz it never reached there. after 'the incident' things kinda got fucked-up. and after a while, we completely stopped all forms of communication. which is kind of sad, coz we got along extremely well, at least in my opinion. hehe. anyway, i think that's way too much of info. i digress way more than necessary. and also, right now talking about the person is majorly depressing me. so i have lost all interest in completing this entry. but heck, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. lol.

yeah, coming back to the point, BK's messages make me feel kinda happy. because they were extremely nice messages. and some pretty flattering stuff. lol. during the period we got along, we REALLY GOT ALONG, if u know what i mean........

anyway, that's that. hopefully the people i've written about won't check out my blog. coz i'm thinking, maybe i've made things a little too obvious. but heck, i really don't think i care too much. and sometimes, u gotta throw caution to the wind; excuse the melodrama.

ramblings of an empty mind

2006-10-20T16:03:00.000+05:30

first of all, a word for satan truimphs. thanks, i think i majorly needed that. refuse to be self-depreciating ever again.

hmm, well college is off for a week. its lovely to have ur hols extended without any prior notice. suddenly, u get to know that u can sleep till eleven for a week longer. aah, bliss. why does sleeping till late, actually the thought of sleeping till late, feel so wonderful? it makes me feel so happy. lol.

thank god diwali is finally here. i somehow love festivals. they make me feel extremely cheerful. and, i hate saying this, chirpy. hehe. the whole concept of festivals makes me all warm and fuzzy. and i'm not really a very warm and fuzzy person most of the time. in fact i'm quite the antithesis of warm and fuzzy.

i seem to have started binge-eating these days. the thing is, i have been getting up EXTREMELY late these days. so there is no way i can eat breakfast. i only have 2 meals during the day. since i'm usually up till late(either on the phone or reading or watching tv) i get MAJOR hunger pangs at around 1:30-2ish. and then i NEED to eat something. end up raiding the fridge. think i'm gonna put on a hell lot of weight if the hols get extended again. coz i don't really eat healthy stuff in the middle of the night. its pepsi, chocolates, pepsi, chips, pepsi, cookies....did i mention pepsi?

ok, this is like a really bad thing to say, very superficial, but i don't wanna get fat! it is like the last thing i would ever want to be. alright, from tomorrow onwards, no sleeping after ten, and eating a proper breakfast and going to sleep by 12:30. am laughing at myself right now coz i actually believed for a moment that i'm gonna start doing that from tomorrow. hehehehehehehe.

feeling slightly sleepy right now so i'm gonna go make myself some coffee(if i sleep now there is no way i'm gonna fall asleep before 4 tonight...given the fact that i got up at 11:30). u go do something more productive than reading my blog.

adios.

mortification

2006-10-17T17:51:00.000+05:30

was going through some of my earlier bogs. ang god, a couple of them actually made me cringe. i'm not saying my writing skills are absolutely brilliant or anything but, christ, there is a limit upto which u can write cliched crap. i cannot believe that i had actually posted all that banal shit. ok all this sounds terribly immodest but hell that stuff is positively mortifying. if somebody ever aked me whether i wrote those things i would be majorly ashamed to admit it.

i don't claim to write brilliantly witty or wonderfully insightful stuff. but heck, i at least don't write pretentious shit. and somehow that is what i seem to have done with some of my earleir entries. if u hve gone through most of my blogs, u'll totally get what i'm saying here.

ok, at the cost of sounding extremly vain, i really can't believe i actually wrote those entries. it is just not me to write things like that. wonder what had got into me? what could have made me churn out all that pseudo-intellectual bullshit?

hmm this is getting terribly boring. really shouldn't bore u with my indignant analysis of my own writing talents. but yeah, if this makes u want to read the earlier stuff which i've written, one earnest request; don't judge me by those entries!

hindsight.......

2006-10-11T23:06:00.000+05:30

hols hv been good. through all the cribbing and the (pretensions of) depression, they've been good. the prospect of going back to college does not make me too happy. the thing is, i have a theory to test whether u're having fun or not. if time slips by really quickly then hell yes u've been having fun, whether u admit it or not. and if the days seem to last years then ok, u arent exactly living it up. haha. anyway, coming back to the point, the last month has passed by really REALLY quickly. its pretty much been a blur. and a very nice, happy blur. in hindsight of course. lol.

lots of things happened, funny things, sweet things, slightly sad things also. but, in hindsight(uff, that word again. note to self : desperately need to improve writing skills), all those things were fun, and well, happy. even the sad things; in a weird, twisted way. lol.

don't have very high expectations from the coming month. get the awful feeling that it's gonna suck pretty badly. don't know why. maybe i'm wrong. in fact, quite possibly i am wrong. i'm just a little weird about these things.

last few weeks i've also realized how much i love my friends. and how fucking much i need them around. love u guys. i refuse to elaborate on this point because....well, i just do.

a point i'd like to make. some ppl are such bloody morons. they like to screw up life even when things are going perfectly smoothly. i am not hinting at anyone in particular right now, but its the truth. yeah even i do it sometimes(did something like that a couple of weeks back....fuck), but i don't do it as often as other people seem to. grow up people, things don't last long enough for u to sulk. sulking is a complete fucking waste of time. not only does it make u feel really wasted, it serves absolutely no fucking purpose. if u wanna show how pissed u are, scream. it'll do u more good(as in, make u feel better) and get ur point across. sulking HARDLY EVER gets ur point across.

i'm wondering why i digress so much. can't stick to one subject for too long. makes my head spin as much as urs. but its a failing which i have, which u have to bear if u read my blog(i'm being awfully presumptious here). but don't u think its kind of fun?makes ur brain sharper, doesn't it? c'mon admit it. alright enough of pissing u off. i tend to talk crap sometimes, when i run out of stuff to talk about. u would have noticed that, if u've read my earlier blogs(and if u haven't, well what the hell are u bloody waiting for???!!!).

so let me stop pissing u off, and go watch tv.

P.S.-this blog almost didn't get published on time thanks to my procrastinating talents(more on that later, it warrants an entire blog entry). publishing this after college started would have kinda defeated the whole purpose of this entry. a vote of thanks to my boredom and my temporary insomnia.

interesting......

2006-10-09T01:48:00.000+05:30

a friend of mine said something very curious about my blog. she said it was extremely depressing. went through my stuff and realized that i tend to write when i'm low. so most of my blogs come out very melancholy and some quite morbid. it doesn't really help me get over me'depression' but it gives me something to do other than brood.

feeling extremely sleepy. was planning to write a longer blog but i can barely keep my eyes open and i wanna publish this blog right now. so let me leave the rest of my ramblings for the next blog and bid u goodbye for now dear reader.

adios!

just one line

2006-10-07T22:20:00.000+05:30

a blog of mine is in its draft stage. just a little bit left. but had to update ppl(who ppl i don't really know....not too many people's lives depend on my blog...lol) who kinda read my blog. my depression has pretty much lifted and i'm back to my (almost) normal self....yayyy!

post puja blues

2006-10-04T19:49:00.000+05:30

well its hit me. and hard. the post puja blues syndrome. happens to me every year but i get over it pretty quickly coz school starts and u hv way too much of stuff to do and no time to mope around. unfortunately this year its a completely different ball game. college is closed till the 15th and i have way too much of time on my hands. not a very good thing, i'm realizing now.

also, this year's puja has been quite eventful. not eventful in general, but eventful personally. not possible to disclose everything on a public forum but lets just say that i have a lot of thinking to do. also, some people are EXTREMELY weird but still......

anyway, thats way too much of a hint for somebody who has any clue about anything. this year, objectively speaking, the pujas have been excellent. i've had a brilliant time mostly. hung out with some new people, all of them quite interesting. and i mean that in a nice way, mostly. lol. but somehow, in hindsight, i wish i had done some things differently. also i did one extremely mean thing but, ironically i don't wish i had done that any differently. and that makes me feel like a major bitch.

alright enough of the vague crap i'm writing. i have a really bad tendency to do that. keep bullshtting about random vague stuff. bad habit. see there i go again. really have to stop doing it.

i'm feeling really low right now. writing, according to the 'experts', is supposed to be thereupatic. don't feel very 'thereupat-ised' right now. in fact, wrting all this shit is making me feel even worse than usual. but again, i don't want to stop coz then its again back to doing nothing. back to the self pity. this sounds really extreme, and yeah, it is extreme for post puja blues, but that isn't the only thing that's bothering me right now, not in the direct sense at least. to put it in a simpler way, i did something during the pujas that wasn't really a very smart thing to do, in hindsight(why do things become clearer only in hindsight??? fuck!!). i tried to put things right but..... unfortunately i must have screwed up way too much i guess.

and this frustration is the worst. the helplessness of my situation is getting to me. well ok, i could do a lot of things, but my bloody ego keeps on getting in the way.

leaving that aside, c.r.park is actually depressing now. after almost a month of revelry, which reached a peak these last four days, it looks ravaged, and dead. like somebody has sucked the life out of the place. its sad. or maybe i'm being morbid. yeah its probably me who is being macabre.

if ur still reading this, i've probably majorly depressed u. so let me stop doing that, and let me go watch friends. yeah i know even that is gonna depress me majorly, with its sickly sweet camaderie(i don't really mean that....i adore friends...lol), but heck, i gotta do something.

'neath the starry sky....

2006-09-25T16:15:00.000+05:30

was my bday on thursday. lovely birthday this year. wasn't too happy till a week back coz the idea of turning 18 didn't appeal much to me. also was slightly insecure about my friends. glad my insecurities were put to rest on my birthday. love those guys so much. really made my birthday special.

went to iit that evening. it was terrific, not so much because of the function(which was pretty good too) but because of the company and the general ambience of the place. absolutely adore the iit campus. and their open air audi is so amazing. sitting there, underneath the starlit sky.....brilliant.

went to rendevous on sunday also. that was the 'big day', the day of the rock show. the whole of the student population of delhi pleads to get passes to the 'rock show of the iit fest' . we were part of the few 'lucky' ones who managed to get the coveted passes(thanks to some great friends of mine who go to iit...lol). had a pretty cool time. coudn't go to the rdx(the famous poolside party) coz by the time we got slightly tired of the rock show, entry into the rdx had closed. didn't bug us too much, coz by then we were loving the whole thing is totality, the music, the cool breeze, the stars shining above, the fireworks(those happened in the end).....it was pretty cool. also, how could i forget, some REALLY cute guys! lol.

what a killer combination naa? good looking and iitian.

came back to earth when i reached home at 11. had 2 bloody tests the next day. was gonna get completely screwed but wasn't too worried coz chandni n hansika were gonna get fucked with me(they were stayin over and they hadnt studied anything either).

went to college today, got majorly fucked in poe but did surprisingly well in mme. quite proud of myself.

at home now, blogging coz i have nothing better to do. should stop now coz i've run out of things to say and am gonna start writing crap any moment now. alrite, it has already begun.

until next time, adios.

memories

2006-09-15T13:00:00.000+05:30

am feeling slightly blue this morning. missing a friend of mine who's gone away to, well, a 'place of no return'. hehehe. by that i mean the big U.S. of A. most people are lying when they say that they'll come back from the US. because most people can't come back from 'the land of opportunity'. especially back to a country like india, where u have to fight for every bit of ur share of ur rights.

this friend was a really good friend of mine. don't know if i can call him one of my closest friends so let's leave it at that, a really good friend. i used to get along so brilliantly with him. he was the person with whom i used to talk about the silliest things in the world. miss all the crazy conversations we used to have. maybe its just me but i got the feeling that he sort of drifted away a little bit right before he left. don't know whether it was concious or..i don't know....it doesn't even matter.

i remember feeling quite disoriented for a period of time right before college. everything was different. things weren't in my control anymore. life was, in a sense, 'spiralling out of control'. that sounds terribly melodramatic, but that was the way i felt then.

i don't feel the same any longer. but things are different. i'm no longer in that coccoon of security i was in a couple of months back. back then, i had a terrific percentage, had got admission in one of the best colleges in the country, was going out with my friends every day. now, my percentage is pretty much immaterial, college is screwing me bad(partially my fault coz i'm not studying), and my friends arent with me anymore(i'm talking strictly in the phyiscal sense, that they arent around everyday).

yeah i know i know this is a phase. i'm gonna make friends in collge, i'll get used to studying blah blah blah. but it won't be the same. its like stepping into someone else's life, and starting again from scratch. and that is the part which is the most discomfitting. the fact that my life till two months back will have no connection whatsoever with my new life. and also terribly sad.

High on Floyd

2006-09-12T23:20:00.000+05:30

was listening to floyd sometime ago. realized their lyrics r SO much better than all the usual philosophical crap u hear everywhere. i mean, they make way more sense that all the philosophical crap that' thrown around. they are so completely uncomplicated yet so open to individual interpretation that its amazing. everybody has his own explaination of a floyd song.

was listening to a song called 'time' (relatively unknown song from their album - dark side of the moon) and man, the lyrics are f***ing brilliant.

so u run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
rcing around to come up behind u again.
the sun is the same in a relative way but you're older,
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.

this is a bit of it, the bit which i like the best. i love what the guy(roger waters has written this one i think) is saying here. he makes his point so completely yet so subtly. but maybe i like it because these 4 lines r the story of my life. that is what is happening to me. every day i wake up, and do nothing worthwhile. every day i tell myself i should do something so that don't regret wasting away my life later on, but i'm just too f***ing lazy to do anything about it. every day its the same thing. i get up, go to college, come back and go to sleep. i'm fucking wasting away my life.

enough of the digression. coming back to floyd, one of my favourite pink floyd songs
is 'brain damage'. i don't know why i like it so much. again, i think its the lyrics which make me like the song so much.

the bit where it goes like,

You lock the door
u throw away the key
there's someone in my head but its not me

i mean, wow! bloody brilliant man. i love the concept of this song. how its about getting completely fucked because everything around u is fucked up too.

and then there is one of their most famous songs 'wish u were here'. its actually written about one band member who had to quit coz of his excessive drug addiction (in fact the whole album is pretty much about him). but personally (and i'm being slightly pompous here in assuming that my personal opinion counts but...hey, its my blog) i really like the underlying sarcasm in the song. of course, that's what i feel. it is quite probable that roger waters isn't being sarcastic at all. but i like to believe that he is.

And did they get you to trade
Your heros for ghosts? Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange
A walk on part in the war
For a lead role in a cage?

if ur still reading this (quite possibly u got bored midway) then u might have got the impression that pink floyd is all about the lyrics. but that is absolutely not true. it is only one facet of their songs. but one which makes their songs so heady(they actually give me a high...lol).

laziness

2006-09-11T18:11:00.000+05:30

i know i know i've been terribly lazy. haven't been blogging at all. the thing is, nothin of much importance(or interest) has been happening, unless u count the college elections. which was sad anyway coz nsui won. yeah i know its a bad idea to air my political leanings on a public forum but i really don't care too much. anyway, the thing is i'm rambling now, but that's because i don't have anything interesting to talk about.

i can talk about my sad sad love life but...right now...i'm not really in the mood. or i could talk about how today is the anniversary of one of the cruelest acts of hatred in recent times but...again...that is not really a very nice thing to talk about. the shadow of 9/11 is on us year round anyway without me adding to the general noise.

hmm, seeing that i have nothing worthwhile to say today i better cut the crap and go away.

so until next time people.

"happy days"

2006-09-02T12:32:00.000+05:30

well life is going to get absolutely terrific starting from today.....2 reasons:-

1) the durga puja programmes start from today
2) my bday is 19 days away

feeling a lot happier than i've felt in a long time. that may also b because college has gotten to b quite a lot of fun these days. thank god it has.

don't know why, but the durga puja is our(read bengalis) biggest event of the year. we look forward to it every year with bated breath and as soon as it gets over we start planning for next year. its almost as if everything we do revolves around one single occasion. strange, if u think about it.......

my love life (finally) seems to b looking up. let me not say too much right now (don't want to jinx it) but at least there is hope....lol.

updats will b posted as and when required.

sad

2006-08-14T19:12:00.000+05:30

i was suppossed to go to dehradun to visit my little sisters and i cant go now bcoz i've fallen ill. quite sad bcoz i was really looking forward to it. always have the worst luck.

and the worst thing is that since i'll b at home i'll b expected to study for these 2 days. especally since i specifically told my parents i'm gonna start studying as soon as i get a couple of days off from college to clear the backlog.....remind me to never make statements like that.

the "buddy factor"

2006-08-14T18:47:00.000+05:30

as arpita has quite rightly pointed out, the 'buddy factor" is causing a major hindrance in my love life. if anybody has any ideas about gettin rid of this "buddy factor" please let me know.

of lost opportunities

2006-08-07T18:36:00.000+05:30

got to know something yesterday which quite surprised me. cant really mention it on a public forum(though some ppl do know wot i'm talking about...lol). all i wanna say is, WHY ME???

have made a resolution to alwayz speak my mind now and NEVER keep anything just to myself.

life....or something like it

2006-08-04T19:47:00.000+05:30

i start having doubts about the purpose of life:-

1)when i get more homework in english, no wait, i get homework ONLY IN ENGLISH when i'm doing eco honours.

2)when the homework consists of reading the works of an obscure URDU poet, and recitng the poem which we like best.

3)when i actually DO A SEARCH on google looking for the works of the poet.

4)when i realize his stuff isnt bad at all(the translations that is) and actually READ ALL HIS COUPLETS!

(the obscure poet is fazi ahmed faiz, by the way, and this is his photo)

2006-08-03T18:24:00.000+05:30

well its been more than a fortnight now. college is definitely a lot better. dont feel the overwhelming need to go home as soon as classes end. major acievement from the first week i would say.

the weirdest thing happenned a few days ago. i met my dancing partner from EIGHT years ago. hez the boyfriend of a freind of mine i met at north campus. i couldnt recognise him one bit. he told me, u look really familiar. a few days later, we meet again, and he goes like, r u tania? do u remember we'd danced together with plates eight years ago??!! talk about coincidence.

went to school on saturday. i came 5th so i got a prize!! could finally see the rock band competition, after passing out of school. sad. anyway the nice bit is that one of the judges was really cute(a band member of bandish), though quite possibly a druggie. he kept going to the loo every half an hour, looking quite disoriented. and also, the lead singer of the dps mathura road was reeaaally cute. bengali too(lol). and sang brilliantly. it was his voice that hooked me. shit, i'm crushing on a kid younger than me. height of desperation. lol. maybe i should put up a notice oh hi5. 17 yr old, looking for companion. shit, so extremely lame. and i'll get all the dirty old men anyway.

anyway, enough of my desperation for now. friends is about to start. until next time........

an update

2006-08-03T18:22:00.000+05:30

well college has begun and its been a week. was so shit scared about ragging on the first day but I HAVENT BEEN RAGGED EVEN ONCE! SRCC honestly is quite nerdy. i'm not complaining though. couldnt be happier.

other than that though, college hasnt been too good except for yesterday. havent found my kind of people yet. met this girl whoz completely my type but shez in the other section! i have the worst karma possible. my fate works overtime to give me a hard time.

baked a cake for arpita on her birthday. hence she forgived me for being horrendously late. lol. piece of advice, if u're ever late for a friend's bday or something, bake a cake(or cookies or a souffle or wotever). saves u everytime. lol.

the babies r one and a half months old now. and they r the CUTESTS THINGS EVER. i know i said it the last time too, but yeah, their pictures r gonna b posted anytime now. i havent been able to do it for the sole reason that my net hasnt been working and the pictures r loaded on the pc. have been using my dad's laptop these days to check my mail n stuff.

weekend's over already. college again from tomorrow. hope it gets better. have never been so low in a long time as the past week. wish me luck.

on cloud number nine....mostly

2006-08-03T18:20:00.000+05:30

alrite so st. stephens isnt happenning. if any1 has read my overly effervescent previous entry, they'll realize there is a lesson to b learnt here. the proverbial story of counting one's chickens b4.....u know. the jerks screwed me in the interview. but heck, i dont give a damn, its their loss. the only regret i have is that the ppl i met there were the kind whom i can imagine hanging out with and having deep discussions with, over a cup of coffee at their "cafe".

also met 2 cute guys. hopefully they screwed up their interviews too and r heading for srcc. i know thats mean, but the thing is, i was quite QUITE dissapointed with the crowd at srcc. i mean, no offence, but i couldnt believe ppl like them r gonna b in srcc! alrite i shudnt b complaining. after all, i'm in the bst F***ing collge for commerce in the whole goddamn country. whoopee.

actually gettin into srcc isnt the only reason for my unnaturally cheerful disposition(lol). my aunt has just had 2 beautiful baby girls!!!! on the 12th of june. cudnt post this earlier coz my useless internet wasnt working again. anyway, coming back to the point, they r absolutely B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L. and so TINY. i cudnt believe how anything can be so tiny. and cant believe its possible to love anything so much. i just loooooove them. their pictures are gonna b posted here anyday now, so WATCH THIS SPACE. and yeah, before i forget, gangaram is a terrible TERRIBLE place to hv babies. and if u havent been paying attention, my little sisters are just beautifulllll.

by the way, my salsa is on hold for the time being. dont think i can manage along with college. mite join again later but for now its not happening. had quite a lot of fun these last 2 months though. advice to any1 who's bored. JOIN SALSA! ITS GREAT! and come to TAPAS EVERY SATURDAY for SALSA NITES. SIDC shud pay me. i'm advertising them for free.

that's all for now, goodbye all.

P.S.- if any1 is goin to hindu do let me know coz i dont know any1 who is and i need some friends over there(considering the fact that it IS the most happenning college in north campus).

am i good or am i good.........hahaha

2006-06-05T15:58:00.000+05:30

guess wot every1? i got a f***ing 100 in maths in the boards!!!!!!!! whoooooooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
and a 93% overall. st. stephens, here i come.

jallianwalla bagh revisited

2006-05-17T12:43:00.000+05:30

when i went to watch rang de basanti, i thought it was an awfully unrealistic movie. i thought thats the part where the police beat up the peacefully protesting people was especially unrealistic. it could never happen in 2006, that too in a metropolitan like delhi.

was i wrong or wot. i owe an apology to the director. he has identified the lawmakers of the country so well. he's bloody clairvoyant. i mean, he practically foresaw the present events.
i am honestly stunned by the way the police has reacted. this is not a democracy. it is practically nazism. ok u have the right to reserve seats (though a right is not suppossed to be misused blatantly, as the government seems to be doing). but u sure as hell dont have the right to suppress our voices. we have the right to voice our opinions. who r u to force ur ideas on us?

2006-05-08T00:12:00.000+05:30

thats me on my farewell

salsa!! part II

2006-05-08T00:03:00.000+05:30

alrite so the first class wasnt such a fiasco. in fact it was quite the opposite of a fiasco. it was great fun. and thankfully our instructor didnt turn out to b the stuck-up bitch me and arpita had envisioned our instructor to be. she was quite sweet in fact. but one of our predictions came true. we had decided that there's bound to b a forty yr old, fat, short, bald man. and yes, there was. who kept gettin out of breath every 15 minutes and coudnt keep track of the 1,2,3's and the 5,6,7's. he kept missing the 2's and 6's and would be on 3 while we were already on 5. both arpita and i are prayin that we dont end up wit him as a partner(we didnt dance wit ne partners on the first day). but since the man is short, it'll probably arpita who'll hv to dance wit him .lookin forward to next sunday, for our nxt class.

salsa!!!!

2006-05-07T23:54:00.000+05:30

yesss finally i'm doing something other than pretending to study for the entrances. am awfully excited. and awfully worried. watch this space to learn about the first salsa class(and to know upto wot extent 2 teenage girls can embarrass themselves).

WTF

2006-05-03T15:38:00.000+05:30

got my vellore result yesterday. guess wot my rank is? take a guess......11248!!!!!!! jesus f***ing christ. wot kind of a rank is that???? does that even make sense? i mean, eleven thousand two hundred and forty eight!!! thats crazy. isnt a rank suppossed to b given only till 5000 or something? actually mine is still comparatively reasonable. i know somebody who's got a rank of forty eight thousand something!! why even give out crazy ranks like that? christ. and on top of that, we have to cope with that highly idiotic 50% quota system. where the hell r we suppossed to go? i mean, does the general category not need to study? do they really think we're gonna get jobs automatically? or maybe they think that we grow money on trees or something. for heaven's sakes, we also do need to go to college!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

disowned by my country

2006-04-17T23:17:00.000+05:30

its hard to believe that after reserving seats for sc's, st's and obc's in colleges, we can still call ourselves a democracy.

is this democracy? it is pure and simple discrimination. and the only people who are gonna benifit out of this are the politicians. not the scheduled castes or other backward castes(the only people who benifit out of the quota sytem are filthy rich people, who just happen to also be sheduled castes), but the politicians only.

reason? try and think, has it ever happenned that when a motion has been passed, EVERY SINGLE PARTY, including the opposition, has seconded it? not really. then why this time, all parties have agreed to the quota system? hmmm...could it be....the elections round the corner??? yes of course it could be, and it is.

why cant the government provide subsidised primary education? if every child gets the same education, the same books, the same teachers then each one has absolutely equal opportunities. it removes the need for reservation of seats for them in collleges.

secondly, most students who get into the premier institutes of our country on the basis of reservation drop out by the end of the 2nd year, as they cannot cope with the curriculum. obviously they cannot, as they HAVE NOT EVEN STUDIED THE COURSE REQUIRED TO CLEAR THE ENTRANCE EXAMINATIONS OF THAT PARTICULAR COLLEGE. is this fair? students who slog for months on end miss out, but people who dont study a word get in just like that. also, the number of seats which are wasted due to the dropping out of the quota students is crazy, and totally unfair to other aspirants.

after this, can the students be blamed if they go abroad to pursue higher education? after all, their own country is practically kicking them out.

future IITian..not

2006-04-12T22:45:00.000+05:30

today was the iit exam.....and, lets just say that i wont b worrying myself to death about getting ragged in iit......

perpetual happiness

2006-04-12T22:44:00.000+05:30

its 2 am n i'm chattin wit a friend. i was practically fallin asleep a moment ago but somethin which he asked me right now has seriously woken me up. he asked me, 'how come ur happy all the time?' and i've never actually thought about it ever. i'm a normal teenager with normal teenage problems n i've never thought of myself as an extraordinarily cheerful person or anything. his question has given me a major jolt. i'm askin myself, do i really come across as a perpetually happy person? and since this question has come from one of my close friends, its even more.......provoking. its not some randon comment by a person who barely knows me. am i really so private that some of my closest friends actually think i hv no problems?? i seriously need some soul searching to find out wot exactly is goin on here. and whether i bottle things up way more often than necessary....

revelation

2006-03-24T21:17:00.000+05:30

have made a stupendous discovery today. all those ppl who have never read anything in their lives other than Femina and Delhi Times(both of which are read diligently and regularly..gotta keep up with the newz no?) and archie comics(that too is sort of doubtful...the language IS hard to grasp sometimes) have the same favourite book. no prizes for guessing which one..... The Alchemist, of course. Pisses me off big time. at least be original and pick some other book, for christ's sakes.

2006-03-23T20:26:00.000+05:30

Well this is my VERY first blog and I'm not too sure about how you're supposed to go about this thing. Anyway, here goes nothing.
School officially ended the day before yesterday. That is, my final board exam got over the day before yesterday. And well, I never thought that things would start falling apart as soon as the exam ended. Ok so I'm kinda exaggerating there. Not IMMEDIATELY!
We went to see a movie, and I cant believe we had a fight about who gets to sit next to who. I mean hello, are we still in 2nd grade??? Anyway, we bickered for some time like kids, and then everyone got mad at everyone and nobody talked to each other during the interval. haha. To top it all, I thought the movie was quite pathetic.
and exactly the next day, one of my best friends broke up with her boyfriend. They were sort of like the poster couple of our batch. It was like, if any pair would last after school got over, it would be them. I thought that their breaking up was sort of symbolic of everything that was to come.
anyway, nothing else has happened, and I realize that I'm either being paranoid or over analyzing things. I think I'm sort of trying to justify the fact the its quite possible that I wont be in touch with most of my friends after I go to college. Which is such a scary thought that I've gone into denial mode and have started calling everyone everyday. Ok I didn't realize how weird that is until I actually wrote it.
but honestly, these are people I've spend thirteen years of my life with. I find it quite hard to believe that quite possibly I wont be hanging out with them practically everyday. It's kinda sad....

A Day In The Life Of An Ordinary Ex-Teenager

Aargh!

Trivial Trivia

Tag!

Morrie

Back in Business Baby!

Tag undone!

The month of May

Comeback of sorts

Of politics, books and cold, harsh winds.

Howdy!

Tag

Post-Puja Update

Noserings, among other things.

Comfortably Numb....Not!

Boredom and Exhilaration

Of Vodka Shots and Lots Of Firsts

Ain't birthdays just brilliant?

Tall Tales

Shooting The Breeze

Wind of Change

Tag!

Random Ramblings

Spreading the Joy

I'm Okay

Rant

I Hear You

On a Rainy Day

Of Procrastination, Blasphemy, Dares and Shopping

Unintended Sabbatical

Random

Tags

Khasmanu Khanya

Retrospection

Of generation gaps and awkward conversations

Woohoo!

The Tag : Have you ever...?

Rose Tinted Glasses

I'm Too Sleepy To Think Of a CLever Title

Collected Short Stories by MeMyself_n_I : Part V

When Life Pulls A Fast One On You

Mindfucked

Thank You Mr. Watterson

Brain Damage

Pun Fully Intended

Of Purple Nails And Dirty Details

Yes They ARE Extremely Valid Reasons, and other things.

Hello There!

Of Life, In No Uncertain Terms

Collected Short Stories by MeMyself_n_I : Part IV

The wait is over, you can stop holding your breath now.

'tis the season to be jolly

the fest and more

25 things i want to do before i die

Abstract

Collected Short Stories by MeMyself_n_I : Part III

Collected Short Stories by MeMyself_n_I : Part II

Collected Short Stories By MeMyself_n_I : Part I

A Rush Of Blood To The Head

uncanny

message fetish??

ramblings of an empty mind

mortification

hindsight.......

interesting......

just one line

post puja blues

'neath the starry sky....

memories

High on Floyd

laziness

"happy days"

sad

the "buddy factor"

of lost opportunities

life....or something like it

an update

on cloud number nine....mostly

am i good or am i good.........hahaha

jallianwalla bagh revisited